1st in The Hour Series series
The Hour Series
Madness and Joy
O something unprov'd! something in a trance!
O madness amorous! O trembling!
O to escape utterly from others' anchors and holds!
To drive free! to love free! to dash reckless and dangerous!
To court destruction with taunts - with invitations!
To ascend - to leap to the heavens of the love indicated to me!
To rise thither with my inebriate Soul!
To be lost, if it must be so!
To feed the remainder of life with one hour of fullness and freedom!
With one brief hour of madness and joy.
From "One Hour to Madness and Joy"
Walt Whitman Leaves of Grass
Xander took another swallow of his beer and counted to ten in his head. Then he counted to ten in his head in Spanish. Then he did it in Fyarl, handily using up his entire vocabulary in that particular language. He thumped the beer bottle down on his kitchen table and looked at the bleached vampire sitting opposite him. Clear blue eyes stared back at him, and the expression in them was...anxious?
"Could you repeat that?" Xander asked. Spike sighed and toyed with his beer bottle, slender fingers picking at the edge of the label. He looked down at his hands, then back up at Xander. "I said that I'm trying to make peace - with you, with everybody." Xander started counting in his head again, and then suddenly stopped. "Everybody...everybody who?" he asked.
Spike sighed again and went back to picking at the label. "Buffy, Dawn, Red, Rupert, Angel," he enumerated in an even tone. Xander stared. "So, everything is cool with all of them? Clean slate? Forgive and forget?" His tone was incredulous. "Even Buffy?" Spike nodded, and there was a glint of satisfaction in his eyes. "Especially Buffy." Xander snorted. "What exactly did you do to make Buffy forgive you for trying to rape her?" He was pleased to see the vampire flinch. The flinch didn't last long. A hard glint came into Spike's eyes, and he leaned forward. "I got a fucking soul, Harris, and it wasn't easy. It still isn't. That was enough for Buffy."
Xander swallowed audibly; Spike was kind of scary like this. He decided to push his luck. "So, you two are back at it?" he sneered. Spike's expression didn't change, but he sat back in his chair. "No, Harris," he said, enunciating clearly, as if he were speaking to a particularly stupid child. "We are not back at it. We never will be. That bridge is thoroughly burned. Neither of us wants to go back there."
Xander digested that tidbit of information for a moment, and then shrugged. "What did you have to do for the others?" he asked.
Xander goggled at Spike. "That's it? All you had to do was apologize?"
Spike nodded. "Yes, I asked for their forgiveness, and they gave it."
Xander sipped some more beer. "And how surprised were you by that?" he asked.
Spike looked at him for a long moment, and then a small smile flitted over his face. "Pretty fucking surprised," he admitted.
They looked at one another and each drank some more of their beer. Xander was startled to find that his was empty. "Another?" he gestured at Spike with his bottle. Spike drained his bottle and handed it to Xander with a nod.
Xander returned to the living room and handed Spike one of the two beers he carried. He sat down heavily on the sofa and let his head hang, elbows on his spread knees. After a few minutes he looked back up at the vampire. "I'm sorry, Spike, but I can't do it. You could give me the most sincere apology in the whole world, and I could tell you that you're forgiven, but it would be a lie." He paused. "I don't think I have it in me." Spike nodded and drank some of his beer. "I know you don't. The others, it didn't cost them anything to forgive me. You and me - men of action and all that. That's why I thought of another way." Xander raised one eyebrow and waited.
"Right," Spike said. "Here's my idea. You can do anything to me for one hour. Sixty minutes. You say it - I do it. You dish it - I take it. But when it's over, we start over; clean slate. No more taunting me with past behavior, no more treating me like garbage. We don't have to be friends, but no more bullshit."
Xander thought about the vampire's words. "Anything?" he asked.
"Anything," Spike agreed, "as long as I'm not dust at the end."
Xander sat, thinking. Spike finished his second beer and sat the empty bottle on the table. Xander's eyes were downcast, and the vampire could almost see the wheels turning in that dark head. What would Harris choose? Spike knew that the kid had a mean streak, and was actually slightly afraid of what that creative, devious mind might come up with. He'd known that Xander would be the most difficult. Well, after Buffy. But she felt so awful about using him that she'd been happy to forgive him. Her asking for his forgiveness had been a shock, but he'd agreed readily. Willow and Giles had been easier, but still awkward. Dawn had acted as if she wanted to refuse, but had suddenly broken down crying in his arms, sobbing her absolution on his shoulder. Spike knew that he could expect no such reaction from Harris.
Spike knew that Xander was still choking on his rage over the vampire's involvement with both Buffy and Anya. Those slights would not be remedied with a simple apology. They demanded a sacrifice, and Spike was willing to offer whatever was necessary. He didn't know how things had gotten so bad, but he really did want another chance with Xander. Perhaps, in the future, they could be...friends. It was really the most he could hope for.
Spike was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't even notice Xander leave the room until the human returned. He was holding a rolled magazine in his hand and shifting his weight from foot to foot. Spike could smell the burst of pheromones rolling off him. Fear, shame, nervousness, longing and arousal were swirling around, intoxicating the vampire's delicate sense of smell. What in the hell was going on, he wondered.
Xander cleared his throat and looked down at Spike. "There's something that I want, and I think you're the only one who can give it to me." His voice was low and strained, and his brown eyes met Spike's, and then skittered away, only to come back again. His hands clenched and released on the rolled magazine until finally, with a nod, he tossed it to land at Spike's feet. Spike picked it up and unrolled it. It was a bondage magazine. The cover showed a blond man holding a leash attached to a darker man, who crouched at his feet, eyes downcast.
Sucking in an unnecessary breath, Spike looked up at Xander. "What exactly do you want, Harris?" he asked, with an edge to his voice. Xander shuffled his feet and didn't answer. With lightning speed, Spike was on his feet, one cool hand reaching out to wrap around Xander's upper arm. His lips were less than an inch from the human's warm ear. "How far do you want to go, mate? You want to stay with bondage and domination, or do you want to get into the heavy S&M? You want me to bleed for you, is that it?" he demanded through clenched teeth. Xander's wide eyes met Spike's narrowed ones, and he had to try twice before he could make words come out of his open lips. "I want...I want you to..." his voice trailed off, and Spike suddenly got it; like the pivotal puzzle piece slipping into place, the big picture was spread out before him.
He had to be sure. He shook Xander slightly by the arm he held. "What do you want, Xander? In the nasty little picture in your head, which one are you? Dom or sub?" Xander's eyes remained downcast, and Spike shuddered when the single word dropped from his pink lips to hang suspended between them: "Sub." Spike very carefully unwound his fingers from Xander's arm and took a short step back, then sat back in his chair. "Right," he said. "Sit down - we need to talk about this." Xander sat, but wouldn't meet Spike's eyes.
"Look at me," Spike said, and he put just a little bit of steel in his tone. Xander's eyes snapped up to his, and he couldn't help the small smile that curved his lips. Lovely boy, he thought. "Why me?" Spike asked. Xander swallowed hard. "We, um - Anya and I experimented a little, but she's so..." Spike laughed. "She may be an ex-vengeance demon, but she's still a tiny little girl, right? You want something with a little more ...authority." Xander nodded. "No matter what, I knew it was just a game with her. I need it to be..."
"Real," Spike finished his sentence for him, and then nodded again.
"I can make it real, Xander," Spike said, keeping his tone even, his voice low. "I can make it very real. This is a game I know well. However, if you're looking for serious torture, I'm not your vamp anymore." Xander swallowed audibly, and Spike smelled fear enter the heady mix of pheromones. Good, he thought, he's not asking for hardcore. He just wants to be dominated. "It's OK," he said soothingly. "I get what you want. You, the one with the overdeveloped sense of responsibility, who always carries the weight of the world, want to be free. You want all of the decisions taken out of your hands. You want to give me all of the control so that I can keep you safe, take care of you. But you want more. You want me to take you places you'd never go on your own. You want me to push your limits and show you what you can have, what you can endure, what you can be. Am I right, Xander?" The human licked his lips and nodded, and Spike smelled the fear recede, to be replaced by relief and more arousal.
Spike reached out and took one of Xander's hands in his own, holding it lightly. He was gratified that the human didn't pull away from the contact. "I can do all those things, Xan, but there's going to have to be some preparation. Will you trust me to take care of the details?"
Xander's eyes flicked up to Spike's and then back down. "Yes, Spike," he whispered.
Spike smothered a smile at the boy's show of submission. He's going to be beautiful, he thought.
Two nights later, Spike showed up at Xander's door. The human ushered him inside with a shy smile that made Spike's jeans feel suddenly too tight. They wound up sitting at the kitchen table in easy silence, each with a beer. Finally, Spike brushed his hand lightly over the one of Xander's that rested on the table. At the touch, Xander looked up, but did not move away. "Saturday," Spike said. Xander nodded. He drew in a shaky breath. "What do I do?"
The vampire pulled his hand away and reached into his back pocket. He handed Xander a plain white card that had an address engraved on the front of it. As the human turned it over and over in his hands, Spike began to speak. He kept his voice calm, but bolstered the words with a little authority. "You'll go there at 10:00 on Saturday morning. You will speak only if you are asked a direct question. You will be taken care of and prepared for me. I'll meet you there at 7:00." He paused and looked at Xander, who met his eyes steadily.
"For our hour together, you will keep your eyes down, unless I direct you to look at me. You will call me 'Spike' or 'Master' - your choice. You will not speak without permission. You will do everything that I ask of you." He paused again, noticing a flush spreading on Xander's face. "I'll take care of you, Xander - I promise that you won't come to harm. I'm not saying that there won't be any pain, because I know you want that, too." The flush darkened, but Xander didn't drop his eyes. "Do you have any questions?"
Xander thought for a moment. "Spike, do we...need a safe word?" he asked.
Spike shook his head. "No. Either you trust me to do this or you don't." He knew that Xander needed total surrender; he also knew that he had no intention of doing anything to the boy so drastic as to require a safe word. He knew he'd been right when Xander nodded and said, "OK."
They finished their beers, and Spike rose to leave. As he passed behind Xander's chair, he laid his hand lightly on the back of his neck. He leaned in so that his lips were behind Xander's ear. "Oh, and one other thing," he said casually, "wanking off after I leave will be the last time you come until Saturday night, so make sure you enjoy it." The vampire whirled and walked out of the apartment, leaving Xander sitting at his kitchen table with a burning face, an open mouth and a raging erection.
He entertained the idea of not beating off - for about a second. In a daze he stood and walked over to the sofa, sprawling at full length on it. With one hand he pushed his sweat pants to his knees, with the other he reached under the cushions to find the tube of lubricant that he knew was there. He opened the battered tube and squeezed a dollop into his palm, rubbing his hands together to warm it. He couldn't help the low moan that was torn from his throat as he pushed his cock through the warm, slick circle of his fingers.
He tried to go slow, but Spike's words were reverberating around in his head, making him breathless with need. He drove himself relentlessly, squeezing and rubbing his thumb over the crown of his cock, his other hand tugging at his balls. He thought about what Spike had said; that this would be his last orgasm until Saturday night. Xander's hands tightened on his flesh painfully as the full implications settled over him. He was gonna come on Saturday night. Spike was gonna make him come during their hour together. That thought sent him spiraling over the edge and he came hard, shooting against his own abdomen and chest, a long groan torn from his lips.
In the hallway, Spike stood with both hands and his forehead pressed to the door, listening. He'd heard the boy's haste to get to the couch and get started, and heard the sounds. That had been expected. What had been unexpected was hearing his own name groaned as Xander climaxed. Spike reached down and rubbed his own erection harshly. He was painfully aroused; those few rough strokes were all it took to make him come in his pants like a schoolboy. With a snort, he turned away and pulled his jacket closer to cover the spreading wet stain on his jeans. Lighting a cigarette, he strode down the hall to the stairs.
Xander hesitated two steps from the door. He turned and paced on the sidewalk. Over the past two days, he had been remarkably at peace with his decision, but in the face of the final step he was scared. He knew that this was something he wanted, something he needed, but he was still afraid. He was about to relinquish total control to Spike. Who was chipless and could kill him easily if he wanted to - soul or no soul. He paced a few more steps.
As he turned to pace back the other way, the door opened and a young man in jeans and a white silk shirt stepped out and looked at him. "Are you Xander?" he asked. Xander stopped in his tracks and stared. The man was lithe and thin. He had wavy black hair and fair skin, and his green eyes snapped with humor. He smiled. "Master Spike said we may have to come out and get you. Will you come with me?" He gestured toward the door. In that moment, Xander made his decision. If Spike knew him well enough to anticipate his behavior, then he saw no reason to distrust him. As logic went, it fell much more on the "insane troll" end of the spectrum than most kinds, but it worked for Xander. He nodded and preceded the man inside.
They passed through a small, featureless foyer to a plain door. The man waved a card to a sensor and the door slid open. They walked into a lobby that could have been any spa in America. The walls were papered in a subtle print, the floor was weathered stone. One corner of the room had a gorgeous waterfall that fell into a fountain, surrounded by lush plants. Comfortable chairs were scattered around, flanked by small tables that held magazines or pitchers of water and glasses. Wall sconces held candles that gave off a light, relaxing scent. Xander's escort told him to take a seat and help himself if he wanted a drink. Xander sank into a chair next to the waterfall and poured himself a glass of water. The cut crystal pitcher was beautiful; the water had paper-thin slices of lemon and lime floating in it.
Xander sipped his water and looked around curiously. There were two other people in the waiting area, a man and a woman. The man was slim and slight in build, and he wore tailored black trousers and a starched white dress shirt. At first glance, he looked no more than sixteen, but upon closer inspection Xander decided he was in his mid-twenties at least. He sat on the edge of his chair with his back upright, his posture impeccable. His feet were together, his hands folded in his lap and he looked at the floor. The woman had a long, honey-blonde braid flowing down her back. She stared at the screen of the notebook computer on her lap through a pair of glasses that perched on the end of her nose. She wore jeans and a t-shirt and had sneakers on her feet. Xander looked at his own black jeans and black t-shirt and decided he looked OK.
A different man, this one short, stocky and dark, approached Xander. He introduced himself as Neil and asked Xander to go with him. Xander set his glass down and followed. Neil wore black jeans and a white t-shirt and was barefoot. He led Xander through several corridors. They passed several rooms with closed doors, another, smaller waiting room, what appeared to be a fully stocked salon and several smaller rooms. Neil stopped at an open door and led Xander inside. There was another man there, standing beside a hospital-type bed. Neil turned to Xander. "Xander, this is Al," he said. Xander nodded, and Al stepped toward him. Al was ebony black and had a shaved head. His smile was huge and blindingly white. He looked at Neil. "He's just lovely," he said, in a surprisingly soft voice, and Xander felt himself blush. Al gestured toward Xander's arm and asked, "May I?" Not knowing exactly what the man meant, Xander nodded anyway. Al lifted one arm and ran his fingers up it, brushing against the light dusting of hair. He made a "hmmmmmmm," noise, then reached into a wall cabinet and pulled out a white terry-cloth robe, which he handed to Xander. "We'll step out and you can get undressed," he said, and before Xander could process that little tidbit both men were in the hall and Xander was alone.
Shrugging, Xander stripped off his clothes, stuffing his socks into his tennis shoes and piling his folded garments on top of them. He slipped the robe on and wandered around the room, checking it out. On a side table he found what looked like a high-tech crockpot. He lifted the lid and smelled the clear liquid inside. Paraffin. Suddenly he understood why Al had looked at his arm. He was going to get waxed. For a second he wondered how far this was going to go. Then he realized that it was probably going to go all the way. Gulp. He sat on the end of the bed and tried desperately to find some sort of convenient place in his mind to file a folder marked "getting waxed so you can be sexually dominated by your vampire nemesis".
After a soft knock on the door, Neil and Al reentered the room. Al looked at him for a moment. "I think I'm going to start with your eyebrows, Xander - they need a little shaping. If you're not shy, you can just lose the robe. I'll give you a sheet to cover your naughty bits and then we can just work our way down." Xander thought about that for a second, then stood and shucked the robe, handing it to Neil. He lay back on the bed and let Al drape a folded sheet across his groin. The black man placed a small pillow under Xander's neck to tilt his head back. Xander felt something cool being lightly rubbed onto the skin around his eyebrows. It felt tingly. "It's an herbal gel that stops this from hurting," Al explained. "Neil's going to start putting it on your arms." Xander nodded and closed his eyes.
He felt Neil begin to rub the gel onto his arms with long, firm strokes. It felt good. His hands are so soft, Xander thought. Softer than even Anya's, but much stronger. He found he wasn't even slightly wigged that two different men were touching him. Good grief, he thought, look at me. I'm totally into guys. I was denial-boy for so long why? Al took a small wand and began carefully applying the warm wax to Xander's unruly eyebrows. Xander felt him press a small cloth strip over the wax, and then tensed as it was snatched away. He was surprised to find the procedure completely painless and relaxed. Al worked on his eyebrows for a few minutes, and Neil finished his arms and started rubbing the gel onto Xander's chest. The two men moved around the bed in tandem, and within twenty minutes Xander found himself with neatly groomed eyebrows and hairless arms, chest and legs. Neil lifted one of Xander's arms over his head, and said, "I'm going to use the clippers for a sec, don't be startled."
Xander winced at the buzz of the clipper, but didn't move as his underarm hair was shorn, then waxed. Neil said, "Well, since the clippers are already out ...Xander, are you ready for this?" Xander saw where Neil was looking and swallowed audibly. He gave the other man a quick nod, and then screwed his eyes shut. Neil pulled back the sheet, and Xander lay perfectly still as his pubic hair was shaved down to a quarter-inch. When the clippers turned off, he opened one eye just a little. He saw Neil smoothing more of the gel onto his hands and immediately slammed the eye shut.
His face burned as Neil smoothed the gel into his skin with efficient motions, lifting his cock, which had decided to embarrass him further by getting half hard, out of the way so he could put more of the gel on Xander's scrotum. Xander bit back a moan. Even this clinical touch felt wonderful. For a moment he imagined it was Spike touching him and he had to stifle another small sound. Al moved in with the wax, and Xander found himself hair-free in that area as well. When he was told to roll over, he sighed in relief. The gel and wax procedure was repeated over the back of Xander's body, and he was relaxed until the sheet was once again swept away. He couldn't help the small moan that slipped out of his mouth when Neil's hands slicked the gel over his ass and down his cleft. Xander bit his lip when the other man's fingers rubbed over his asshole, and he had to fight the urge to press back into the contact. The gel tingled, and the brush of Neil's finger against his hole was causing sparks to shoot up his spine. He wondered if Spike was going to fuck him tonight. He wondered if he was suffering from a psychotic break when he found himself hoping that the vampire would.
Finally, the waxing was done, and Xander was instructed to put his robe back on. Neither member of his audience seemed concerned about Xander's raging boner, so he tried to forget about it himself. Neil touched his elbow and led him down the corridor to another small room. During the next two hours, Xander was given a barber shop-quality shave with a straight razor, complete with hot towels; a steam facial; and his first-ever manicure and pedicure. He was then led into a small room that held a table and two chairs. There he was served a light lunch and a glass of wine. The room had a selection of books and magazines and an attached bathroom. Xander admired himself in the large mirror for a while, marveling at the absolute smoothness of his body. He was also pleased with the way the technicians had been able to make his construction worker's hands look elegant and well cared for. Back in the room, he found an interesting book and read until Neil came for him.
He was led to another treatment room. This one was warm and dark and held a massage table. Neil told him to lie down on his back, and Xander quickly dropped his robe and complied. For the next ninety minutes, Neil used his considerable skills and a half a bottle of lightly scented massage oil to turn Xander into a completely relaxed puddle of goo. Having never had a massage before, Xander was surprised to find that he enjoyed having his hands, feet and scalp rubbed almost as much as he enjoyed the large muscle work on his back. He didn't even flinch when Neil's strong hands kneaded his buttocks, giving himself over to the sliding sensation of the oil and the languor that crept over him.
He didn't even realize he'd fallen asleep until he was awakened by a soft touch to the middle of his back. "Come on, Sleeping Beauty," Neil teased. Xander sat up groggily, and gratefully accepted the glass of juice he was offered. After handing back the empty glass, he hopped off the table and stretched, unconcerned with his nudity. He donned the robe Neil held out and followed the man through a long corridor to yet another room. This one seemed to be far from the others, and the hall held only four doors. "This is your suite," Neil told him, opening the door. The room was beautifully decorated in dark colors and lit only by candlelight. A large, opulently hung bed dominated it, and a leather sofa and two chairs were nestled in one corner. Another corner held a bar and a high table with two stools. Neil led Xander to another door and opened it to reveal a huge bathroom. He walked them over to a frosted glass door.
"This is the steam sauna," he explained. "I'll set the timer for twenty minutes. Once the steam stops come back out here and take a bath or a shower - whichever you prefer. Then you are to rest until I come for you. It will be a couple of hours, so nap if you can. You should be relaxed enough. The bar is stocked. If you need anything, pick up the phone by the bed and press 9, and I'll come to you, OK?" Xander nodded and stripped off his robe, which was pretty well covered in massage oil. Neil took it and gestured to two more just like it that hung on hooks next to the sauna. Xander nodded again and stepped through the frosted door.
The steam was great. Xander lay down at full length on the wooden bench and felt every pore in his body open up and sweat freely. It felt like all of his concerns and worries were being pulled out and swept away. He realized that he felt wonderful. He'd been pampered for hours. Xander was usually the one who took care of others, so having so many people focused on him was intoxicating. He felt like a show dog. Then a thought struck him. That's exactly what he was to these people - a prized pet. They all thought he was a vampire's cherished fuck-toy, being readied for his Master. Xander laughed when he realized that description was not far off the mark. He was a vampire's fuck-toy. The beautiful part was that he had absolutely no control over the situation, so he had the freedom to let go and enjoy the sensations, and so far, the sensations had been, well - sensational.
Too soon the steam stopped hissing into the sauna. He exited reluctantly, surprised to find himself a little lightheaded. He padded out to the main room naked and got some more juice from the well-stocked refrigerator under the bar. The liquid made him feel better, and he returned to the bathroom for a shower. The shower was huge and made of marble. It had a full array of bath products, which Xander was perplexed to find were all completely unscented. He puzzled over that for a while before he realized that since this place catered to non-human clientele, they would obviously not offend vampire senses with artificial scents. He washed and conditioned his hair, and scrubbed the massage oil away with a luxurious bath gel. The feeling of his own hands sliding over his hairless body was wonderful, and he had to fight the urge to touch his erection.
After the shower, Xander dried off on the biggest, fluffiest white bath towels he had ever seen, and tumbled onto the huge bed. The wanton slide of the silk sheets did absolutely nothing to dim his arousal, but he fell asleep in minutes anyway.
A soft knock at the door was followed a moment later by Neil's entry into the room. The dark-haired man walked to the refrigerator and poured Xander a glass of water. He brought it to the bedside table and shook Xander's shoulder. He was sleeping completely uncovered on his stomach with his head buried in the pillow, and finally turned his head toward Neil, rising up on his elbows. Neil gasped softly, and Xander tilted his head in question. The other man ducked his head. "I'm sorry, Xander," he said, "You just look so...damn, you look gorgeous like that. Your Master is going to fall over when he sees you. He's a lucky man." Xander's expression changed to a shy smile, and when Neil looked back at him, Xander nodded in thanks.
Xander sat up on the bed and drank his water. Neil walked into the bathroom and got him a robe, which he put on. They left the room and walked back to the main part of the spa. This time they stopped at the salon, and Xander was shown to a chair. Two other men joined them. One began running his hands through Xander's tousled hair while the other stood back watching. "I can see why we aren't allowed to cut the length - it's wonderful just as it is. I'm thinking a trim and just a few reddish highlights."
The other man said, "Burgundy; with his skin tone it will be fabulous." They argued back and forth, but Xander tuned them out. Eventually, they came to a decision. The first man misted Xander's hair with water and began the trim; the other left the room and returned a few moments later with a bowl of foul-smelling hair color.
Once the trim was complete, the second man began separating small sections of Xander's hair and brushing on the color. As he finished each section he wrapped it in a small square of foil. Once he finished, Xander was brought a light snack and a soda to enjoy while the color took effect. Neil stayed by his side the entire time. Xander decided he like the masseuse, and that he didn't mind his presence. A timer sounded, and the colorist returned. He pulled all of the foil out of Xander's hair, and then led him to a sink. Xander leaned back, and the man washed his hair three times with the unscented shampoo to remove any trace of the chemical smell. He rubbed a handful of unscented conditioner over Xander's hair, and then rinsed it with cool water.
Xander was returned to the man who had cut his hair. Twenty minutes later Xander stared into the mirror dumbstruck. His hair was still long, falling well past his collar in the back. It was shaped into artfully tousled waves; he looked like he'd just woken up. The burgundy streaks were very subtle; they gave his hair dimension and glinted in the salon's lights. Xander reached up to touch a lock and found it was as soft as silk. He nodded and smiled at the two hairdressers, who fussed over him and told him he looked fabulous.
Neil led Xander back to his suite. Once they arrived, Neil told Xander to go to the bathroom and do "anything he needed to do", because this would be his last chance before his Master arrived. Nodding, Xander left the room. He used the bathroom and washed his hands, then brushed his teeth for good measure. He looked at himself in the mirror and tried to quell his rising panic. He started when a soft knock sounded on the door. He opened it and Neil stepped inside. Laying a hand on Xander's arm, the shorter man smiled up at him. "It'll be OK, Xander," he said, his tone warm and reassuring. "I know you're new to this, but you don't need to be scared. Your Master is going to be so happy with you. Any Master would be." He turned Xander to face the mirror. "Look at you. You're just gorgeous; what's not to like?" Xander smiled at Neil's teasing tone and laid his hand over the other man's for a moment. They exchanged a nod and walked back into the main room.
Xander immediately noted that some changes had been made. The bed had been restored to its original, pristine condition, his empty glass had disappeared, and, more ominously, there was another person present. Neil introduced Xander to the other man, who was named Paul. Paul spread a white sheet on the floor and asked Xander to step to the center of it. Neil held out a hand for Xander's robe. Xander stripped and did as he was told. Xander was truly stymied when Paul began brushing a light powder all over his lower body with a big, fluffy brush. It tickled. While Paul powdered his legs, Neil stepped up in front of Xander.
"Xander," he said, still using the same reassuring tone, "I need to put this on you." Xander looked at what Neil was holding and blushed. He knew what it was; there had been pictures in his magazine. It was a leather cock ring. Xander looked down at his dick and thought that it was probably as far from hard as it had ever been. Neil's glance followed his, and then came back to Xander's eyes. "Do you want to..." he hesitated. "Or do you want me to..." Neil's voice trailed off, but he had his answer when Xander's cock suddenly decided to join the game by twitching and beginning to fill. Neil wrapped one hand loosely around Xander's shaft and stroked him into full hardness easily. Xander couldn't stop himself from thrusting eagerly against the other man's hand; it felt so good. Neil's hand was warm, and his skin was unbelievably soft. With his other hand Neil snapped the ring into place.
Vacillating wildly between embarrassment and arousal, Xander hardly noticed the ring being attached. Neil released his cock, and glancing down, Xander could see a matching erection pressing against the other man's zipper. He was stunned that he could elicit such a reaction in another man, and also very aroused that it was so. Xander remained lost in thought as Paul powdered the rest of his lower body. Once he was finished, Paul reached into a large box that sat on the low table and pulled out a pair of black leather pants.
The pants were completely open down both sides. Instead of side seams, they had a row of tiny eyelets. The two men worked in tandem to put them on Xander. Neil held them at the waist while Paul crouched at Xander's feet and began lacing one leg of the pants with a leather thong. The leather was butter-soft and beautifully supple. As he laced, Paul smoothed the leather and pulled it tight across Xander's body. Xander noted that the knees of the pants were strongly reinforced; they were intended to be worn by someone who would kneel a lot.
Paul deftly laced the pants to the top of Xander's thigh, and then paused. With an apologetic smile, Neil reached in and arranged Xander's erection so that it was prominently displayed against the plain front of the trousers. Once he finished, Paul resumed lacing, tying the thong at the low waist of the pants. The action was repeated on the other side. The two men circled Xander, making small adjustments. The pants were skin-tight. In the back, the leather flowed over Xander's buttocks and clung to the cleft of his ass
Once the pants were perfect, Neil rubbed a light coat of unscented oil onto the rest of Xander's body to make him gleam in the candlelight. Paul reached back into the box and brought out a pair of leather gauntlets. He placed them on Xander's wrists. They covered him from the base of his wrist to halfway up his forearms. The cuffs fastened with snaps, but also had eyelets attached to them. Xander wondered about them for a moment, but got his answer when Paul pulled his hands behind his back and laced the two cuffs together. His arms were stretched back, pushing his chest out. The position of his wrists allowed his hands to clasp together naturally, while defining every muscle in his arms, shoulders and back with a minimum of tension.
Neil led Xander off of the drop cloth, and Paul swept it up and folded it. Walking him back to the center of the room, Neil told Xander to kneel on the floor. Xander complied, and Paul stepped forward to clasp a black leather collar around his neck. It was thick and supple and plain; it closed with a simple silver buckle, which Paul positioned at the base of Xander's throat. Neil crouched in front of Xander as Paul gathered up the supplies and prepared to leave. "It's been nice helping you, Xander," the dark man whispered. "You'll do beautifully. Eyes down now, your Master will be with you soon." Xander cast his eyes down, and Neil patted him on the shoulder and followed Paul from the room. The door shut behind them and Xander was alone.
He concentrated on breathing slowly and not panicking. He kept repeating the phrase "no choice" to himself. Xander had no idea how much time had passed when he heard footsteps approaching the door. There was a low murmur of voices, and then the door opened. Xander knew it was Spike by the faint smell of tobacco. The vampire closed the door behind him and stepped into the room. He deliberately did not look at Xander, who was facing away from him. He stripped off his jacket and folded it over the back of a chair. He unlaced his boots and removed them, and then his socks and his t-shirt, leaving him clad only in a pair of old, faded jeans. He walked over to the bar and poured himself a short glass of JD. Carrying his drink, he walked to the bed and sat on the end of it. Finally, he looked at Xander.
The boy was more beautiful than he had imagined, he admitted to himself. He was on his knees, with his hands bound behind him and his head hanging, eyes on the carpet. His skin gleamed in the candlelight, and Spike could see every muscle of his back and arms. Construction work had been good to Xander, broadening his shoulders and melting off his layer of baby fat. Spike was pleased to note that his very specific instructions regarding Xander's hair had been followed. He liked it over-long and shaggy. Spike scented the air and smelled only arousal and nervousness, but no fear. Finishing his drink, he stood and walked around in front of Xander.
Spike let his eyes wander over Xander's chest and abdomen admiringly, then looked down to the front of the leather trousers. Xander's erection was fully outlined by the skin-tight leather; Spike could even clearly see the cock ring. Fighting the urge to run his fingers down the impressive length, he instead started running them lightly over Xander's shoulders and chest, mapping the smooth planes with soft touches. His fingers trailed along the thick leather band of the collar, and Xander swallowed hard. Spike worked his way around Xander's body, getting the boy used to the feeling of Spike's hands on him. As he touched golden skin, Spike noted any and all reactions.
Finally, his exploration finished, Spike stood in front of Xander and spoke his first words since entering the room. "Xander, unbutton my jeans with your teeth." A shudder ran through Xander's body, and Spike saw him clench his jaw. Spike repeated his demand, and Xander clenched his jaw again. In a flash, Spike's open hand rocketed against Xander's cheek with a loud "crack". The strike was hard enough to knock the bound man back slightly, but Spike did not miss the twitch of Xander's lips. That twitch told him that his reaction had been correct; that like a child or a puppy, Xander was testing his limits and reassuring himself that Spike was fully in charge. Spike looked down and thought he'd never seen anything so beautiful. Xander's eyes were downcast, his hair hung in loose waves over his forehead, and the vivid red imprint of Spike's hand showed plainly on his face. Spike seriously thought he was going to come in his pants.
A second later, Spike was surprised when Xander leaned in and rubbed his cheek against Spike's hip. The vampire tangled one hand in his silky dark locks and leaned into the contact for a moment. "It's OK," he said. "I forgive you." Xander gasped when Spike's fingers tightened brutally in his hair. In a no-nonsense tone the vampire continued, "I will have your obedience, Xander. Don't defy me again. Are you going to do as I say? Answer me."
Xander whispered, "Yes, Spike."
"Good boy," Spike replied. "Unbutton my jeans with your teeth. Now." Xander leaned forward and grasped the material with his teeth and pulled. The jeans were so old and worn that the top two buttons came undone easily. Xander pulled again and the other buttons slipped free. Spike shucked off the jeans and threw them behind him to stand naked before Xander.
Spike stepped forward so that Xander had no choice but to be up close and personal with the vampire's hard on, since it rested against his cheek. Spike's hand was back in his hair. "Open your mouth," he commanded. Xander complied, and Spike used his other hand to guide the head of his cock to rest against Xander's lips. "I know you've never done this before," he continued, "but I will tell you how to please me. You want to please me, right? Answer me."
Again Xander whispered, "Yes, Spike."
"Good," the vampire said, pressing his cock more firmly against the boy's mouth. "Lick it." Eyes still downcast, Xander licked firmly around the head of the vampire's erection, following the line of the foreskin and dipping into the slit. Spike's eyes drifted shut, and he bit back a moan at the incredible sensation of Xander's tongue on him. The boy continued to lick at Spike's flesh, growing bolder and running his tongue as far down the shaft as he could reach.
"That's it," Spike hissed. "Make me wet. Suck me." Xander's mouth opened wider then closed on the head. He started to suck gently, and this time Spike moaned aloud. "So good, God, Xan, your mouth is so hot." The vampire knew he was babbling, but he wanted to make sure Xander knew exactly how much he was enjoying it. "Open your mouth wider and try to relax your throat. See if you can take it all in." Spike kept his hand in Xander's hair, but let the human go at his own pace, bobbing his head forward a little more on each stroke.
Xander had absolutely no idea what he was doing, but was shocked to find that he enjoyed the sensation of having Spike's cock in his mouth. The vampire's erection was cool, and his skin tasted clean and slightly spicy, with a hint of bitterness that Xander didn't want to think about too much. He followed Spike's directions, and tried to relax his throat. He tried to do all the things he remembered that he liked having done to him, so he drew back a little and sucked powerfully on just the head, then leaned in to engulf as much of the shaft as he could, while slipping his tongue around and around the flesh in his mouth.
When Xander sucked him hard, Spike came up on his toes and yelped, then hissed when the boy leaned forward to try and deep-throat him. He couldn't help thrusting just a little, and smiled when Xander gamely tried to accommodate him. Finally, Xander's nose was nestled in his pubic hair, and Spike thought the top of his head was going to blow off from the extreme pleasure. Tightening his hand in Xander's hair, Spike pulled him back a little. "Look at me, Xander," he said, sounding a little breathless. Xander looked up, and Spike saw that his eyes were so dilated with passion as to appear black. They widened at the expression he saw on Spike's face, and he smiled around the cock in his mouth. Xander was seriously aroused by the needy, hungry look on the vampire's face, and also that it was because of him.
Blue eyes met brown; both were sparkling in the candlelight. "Xander, you're so good. You feel so good. I'm gonna fuck your mouth now. I won't hurt you. I'll warn you before I come, but I'm gonna come in your mouth and I want you to swallow it." Seeing both shock and acceptance in Xander's eyes, Spike put his other hand on the back of his slave's neck and said, "Eyes down." Xander immediately dropped his gaze and braced himself. He was surprised when Spike began thrusting gently into his mouth; he'd expected a brutal ride. The pace increased as Spike felt his orgasm building. He would have liked to continue this game for much longer, but he could tell that Xander was tiring, and time was passing much too quickly.
"Xander, I'm gonna come. Oh, God...I'm gonna...fuck, yeah...so good ...coming now!" The last word was a strangled scream as Spike tightened his hold on Xander painfully and climaxed, pumping spurts of semen into the human's hot mouth. Xander tried to catch it all, but some slipped out of the corners of his mouth as he swallowed repeatedly. Spike continued to thrust gently until his cock was completely soft, and then pulled away. Xander panted harshly, and Spike fell to his knees. Placing his hands on Xander's shoulders, he leaned in and licked up any traces of his own come that were left on Xander's face, neck and chest. As soon as the human's breathing returned to normal, Spike gave in to his earlier urge and caressed the leather-encased length of Xander's erection. He slid his hand up and down the shaft; stopping to trace the outline of the cock ring, and dipping down to cup Xander's balls.
Spike continued to trace Xander's cock through his pants, and leaned in to lay his cheek against Xander's so that his lips were brushing the human's ear. "You want me to take care of this for you, Xander?" he asked, adding, "Answer me," as an afterthought when he wasn't answered right away.
Spike felt his erection return when Xander whispered back, "If it ...pleases you, Spike." For a moment, Spike harbored a fleeting thought, wishing that this were real, that Xander truly did belong to him. The boy would make a wonderful slave - he was obedient, responsive and eager. But, Spike knew that he wasn't looking for a slave. What he really wanted was an equal, a mate, a lover. Shaking off his reverie, he brought himself back to the matter at hand.
Rising gracefully to his feet, Spike leaned down. "Stand, Xander," he instructed, and helped the human to his feet. Having his arms bound behind him made it hard to balance, and his legs were stiff from holding the kneeling position. Once Xander was on his feet, Spike untied the leather thongs that laced the sides of his pants and slowly peeled the leather away. The vampire stood for a moment and simply stared. Xander's cock rose from the black leather cock ring and stood almost flat against his belly. The skin was a deep rosy hue, and drops of fluid stood out on the head. Spike wrapped one hand around the base of the shaft and squeezed, causing more drops to pulse from the slit. He slid his hand up the length, and swept his thumb over the head to collect the fluid, which he then tasted.
He crouched down in front of Xander and ran a teasing finger between the human's now hairless balls. Xander shuddered and shifted his stance slightly, spreading his legs to give the vampire better access. With a hand on his hip, Spike turned his slave around. He found himself looking at a gorgeous backside, with Xander's bound hands clasped just above it. Spike grabbed both of Xander's hands and pushed them up, causing the human to bend over slightly. "Stay there," he instructed, then released Xander's hands. With his thumbs, he parted Xander's buttocks and leaned forward to brush his lips over the human's hole. Xander groaned. Spike then darted out the tip of his tongue to tease the opening.
Spike smiled as Xander bent over further and pushed into the contact. Spike licked delicately for a few seconds, and then abruptly thrust his tongue in deeply. Xander's entire body stiffened and he bit his lower lip to avoid screaming Spike's name. The vampire pushed his tongue into Xander as far as he could, stretching and laving his soft inner skin. He could feel the human's legs trembling, and Xander's ass clenched rhythmically around his tongue. Finally, Spike pulled his face away, smiling when Xander moaned to protest the loss of contact.
Spike took Xander's arm and led him to the bed. "Kneel up in the center of the bed," he instructed, and steadied Xander as the human complied. Spike opened a drawer in the bedside table and pulled out a tube of lubricant. He knelt on the bed, arranging them so that he was at Xander's side, with one of the boy's hips pressed into his abdomen. Spike opened the tube and coated both hands with the slippery gel. "You've been such a good boy, Xander. I've got a reward for you." They both moaned as Spike slipped one hand around Xander's erection and the other between his legs from the back.
Spike stroked Xander's cock slowly, while circling his hole with the index finger of the other hand. Every few strokes he would slide his finger over Xander's pucker, pressing but not entering. As soon as the human started pressing back against his finger, Spike breached him completely in a sudden motion. Xander yelped and stiffened, holding his body perfectly still. Spike held his finger motionless, but jacked Xander a little faster with the other hand.
Holy shit! Xander's mind was whirling. Spike's got his finger in my ass, he thought. And his hand on my dick and earlier he had his tongue in my ass and before that I blew him and swallowed his come. Holy shit! Spike's finger started pumping in and out of him, and Xander was infinitely thankful for the cock ring. It hurt like a bitch, but it kept him from coming. And he was pretty sure that coming without permission would earn him more than a little slap. Both of Spike's hands sped up, and Xander's brain shut off as a second finger joined the first one inside his tight channel. The fingers twisted and crooked, and Xander saw stars and gasped as the vampire rubbed over his prostate.
Suddenly, Spike stopped moving, and the only sound in the room was Xander's harsh panting. "Xander," Spike said, and his tone held just a little uncertainty. "Xander, the hour is up." Neither man moved for a long moment, and Xander nearly laughed at the absurdity of reality intruding on them when he was bound and collared, with a naked vampire simultaneously jacking him off and finger-fucking him in some sort of demon-friendly bondage spa. Xander waited. Spike's head came down to rest on his shoulder. "Xander, do you want me to stop? Or do you want to finish this?" Spike waited, then whispered, "Answer me." Xander kept his head bowed and his eyes screwed shut. He took a long, shuddering breath and said, "Finish it...Master."
At that word, the one Spike had been certain he would never hear from Xander's lips, the vampire pressed himself against the human and resumed moving both hands at once. He slid his own erection against the hollow of Xander's hip in time with his strokes on the boy's cock. His fingers brushed the cock ring, and he realized that Xander would probably be hurting by now. He pulled his fingers from Xander's ass, and let out a low chuckle when he heard a moan of protest.
"Relax, Xander," he said. "I'm not stopping. You can't come with this ring in place. I'm going to take it off, but don't come until I tell you. Do you understand? Answer me." Xander breathed out and sighed, "Yes, Master." Spike trembled at the sound of that word again. He used one hand to release the cock ring and the other to grasp the base of Xander's erection firmly. He knew that the sudden loss of pressure would be impossible for the boy to withstand, and didn't want him to come before he could help it. As soon as the tremors that racked Xander's body subsided, Spike leaned in again. "Do you have control? Answer me." Xander gulped and said, "Yes, Spike."
Spike resumed a leisurely pace, stroking Xander gently, going easy on his over-stimulated flesh. He rubbed his own weeping cock against the flat of Xander's hip, swiftly bringing himself back to a fever pitch. As soon as he felt his own orgasm rising, he sped up his pace and pressed his fingers back into Xander's ass. A few more strokes and he was at the edge. "Come, Xander. Right now, come with me," he moaned, rubbing the boy's nub hard. "Oh, fuck, yeah! Fuck!" Spike came with a strangled shout, and Xander groaned and shot all over Spike's hand and the top part of the bed, his ass clenching strongly against the vampire's friction-warmed fingers. Xander sagged into Spike's arms with relief, and Spike pulled his fingers out and carefully laid him down face first on a clean patch of the bed to unlace the gauntlets and remove them.
He shifted Xander over onto his back and cradled the human's head in his lap. Xander's eyes were closed, and he was still panting. Spike rubbed his arms, and then reached to unclasp the collar, laying it gently on the bedside table. He shook Xander's shoulder and said, "Look at me." Xander's eyes opened languidly, and he looked up at Spike and smiled. The smile was returned. "Go start the shower. I'll be there in a minute. I want you on your knees in the shower when I get there." Xander's eyes blinked once and his smile broadened a tiny bit. He rolled off the bed and padded to the bathroom. Spike picked up the phone, dialed 9, hung the phone back up and followed Xander.
Spike entered the walk-in shower to see a breathtaking sight. Xander was kneeling on a thoughtfully provided rubber mat just outside the reach of the cascading water. His eyes were downcast, and his hands were clasped at the small of his back. Spike stepped up to him and urged him under the water with a hand on his shoulder. "Stand up and unclasp your hands," he directed. Xander complied, and Spike tenderly washed his hair and body with the unscented bath supplies. He stepped back to wash his own hair when Xander lightly brushed his head against the vampire's shoulder. "What is it, Xander? Answer me," Spike said.
"Let me," Xander said, and Spike nodded and handed him the shampoo bottle. The slight difference in their height allowed Xander to wash the vampire's hair without raising his eyes too much, and he washed him gently, fingers skating lightly over Spike's hard body.
Spike turned off the water, and Xander stepped out of the shower, returning with a towel. He carefully dried Spike, and then went back for another towel for himself. When they exited the shower again, they returned to the main room to find that the bed had been changed and straightened, and that their folded clothing and a large shopping-type bag sat on the end of the bed. They dressed in silence. Spike finished first and walked to the bar. He poured himself another JD and got Xander a glass of juice. They drank in silence and placed the glasses on the bar. Spike gathered the bag and gestured for Xander to precede him from the room. The hall was empty and so was the lobby. They got into Xander's car, and he drove them back to the apartment.
They sat in silence in the parking lot. Xander could hardly believe that it was only quarter past nine. He sighed, and looked at Spike. "Clean slate, then?" he asked.
Spike turned to him and smiled. "Really?" he asked.
Xander returned the smile. "Yeah." He hesitated. "Can I ask you a couple of things?" Spike nodded. The human drew in a deep breath. "Did I do OK?' His tone was uncertain.
Spike took in an unneeded breath. "God, Xander - you were...unbelievable. You did great." Xander's smile was a gorgeous combination of pride and embarrassment.
"How come, through all that we did, you never kissed me?"
It was not the question that Spike was expecting. He didn't know exactly what question he was expecting, but that was not it. He mulled over possible responses in his head and then just went with the truth. "Because you had no choice, Xander, and when we kiss it will be because we both want it, no excuses."
Xander thought about that for a moment. Spike had said "when we kiss", not "if we kiss". Spike wanted to kiss him; he just knew it. He had to believe that a guy who wanted to rim you at least wanted to kiss you a little bit. "OK. What's in the bag?"
Spike handed it to him and he dug through it enthusiastically. It held the leather pants, gauntlets, cock ring and collar, as well as a set of the unscented bath products and a jar of the powder that had been used to assist in the putting on of the trousers. Xander nodded. They sat in silence for a long moment, and then the human turned and opened the car door. He made as if to stand, and then turned back to Spike. "It's still pretty early. You wanna come up for a beer?" Spike nodded.
They drank a couple of beers each and watched an old monster movie that was on cable. After it was over, Spike rose to leave. Xander walked him to the door. When the vampire reached for the doorknob, Xander intercepted his hand and used it to spin him around and press him up against the door. Just before their lips touched, Xander whispered, "My choice." The kiss was tentative, soft and sweet, and about a thousand times more erotic than anything else they'd done that night. Xander released Spike, and pulled him away from the door. They said goodnight, and Spike headed home. Standing by the door, Xander absentmindedly reached into the back pocket of his jeans. There were two white business cards in the pocket. One of them was the one that Spike had given him with the address of the spa. The other was exactly the same, except it had a phone number and a name scribbled on the back. The name was "Neil". Laughing, Xander tore that one into small pieces and threw it away. He put the other one carefully into his wallet.
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