But it's Better If You Don't


Spike hurried home. Work had ended early thanks to an unexpected- but highly fortuitous- power failure. Which had meant that he had had time to swing by the Chinese place to pick up dinner for himself and Xander and would still be home at least an hour early.

Xander. The best thing that had ever happened to him. They had been together a whole year, and now they could celebrate properly with good take-out food, a good film, and good sex. At twenty years old, he had honestly thought he would never get around to losing his virginity. He had been too shy and reserved. Then he had met Xander and had known that the brunette was the one. For Spike, it had been love at first sight. And Xander seemed to feel the same way too. Now twenty one, he had waved goodbye to his virginity and his insecurities and had never felt better.

Making love to Xander had been a revelation. It was nothing like the feeling he got from his own hand, and the prostate was most definitely his new best friend. Xander had been so gentle, taking his time and making Spike feel loved and cherished.

They had moved in together six months into the relationship, when Xander’s basement home had flooded. Spike’s friends and parents had worried that things were going too quick, especially seeing as it was Spike’s first relationship ever. Spike laughed, remembering his parents’ reaction. He had visited one Saturday afternoon, practically wetting himself from nerves. The door had swung open to reveal his dad, looking confused at his son’s presence. Spike had found his shoes suddenly fascinating as he stuttered out that he was moving in with his boyfriend and that he hoped he wasn’t too much of a disappointment to them. His dad had shrugged and simply said that he had known Spike was gay for years.

“What do you mean, you’ve ‘known for years’? I only figured it out myself two years ago!”

No response beyond a laugh and “Would you like to come in for a cup of tea?”

Spike pulled into the parking space he always parked in, switching off the engine and grabbing the bags of food from the passenger seat. He jogged up the stairs to their top floor apartment, humming softly to himself. Sliding the key into the lock, he called out to his boyfriend.

“Hey honey, I’m home. I brought dinner. Maybe we could... Oh.”

The sight that greeted him made his stomach turn. Xander was on the couch, totally naked. Beneath him was a blonde girl, who was moaning like she was getting the shag of her life. Xander met Spike’s stunned gaze and came, hard, inside the girl. He pulled out of her and stood up, unashamed of his nudity. She brushed her fringe out of her eyes and scowled at Spike like he was the one at fault.

Xander pulled on a pair of jeans, not bothering to button them. “Spike, this is Anya. She’s… Well, she’s kinda my girlfriend.”

Spike swallowed. He wasn’t entirely sure whether or not he was still stood up or if he had slid to the floor. He felt completely numb. “How long? Were you even going to tell me?”

“Don’t. It’s better if you don’t ask. I know this isn’t the ideal way for you to find out or anything, and its probably not a great day, either, but at least its out in the open now, right?”

Spike didn’t say a word, just looked at Xander and wondered when it had all gone wrong.

“Spike? Spike, I’m s-“

“DON’T! Don’t you dare tell me you’re sorry! Take your girlfriend and get the fuck out of my home. You can pick your stuff up tomorrow.” He opened the door and waited while Anya dressed and Xander grabbed his discarded shirt from the floor. When they had made it out into the hallway, Xander turned to speak to Spike, only to be met by the door slamming shut.

In the apartment, Spike slid down the door onto the floor. He sat there for a while before pulling himself to his feet and over to the phone. He dialled the familiar number and waited.



“William? Happy birthday. And happy anniversary too.”

Spike’s numbness fell away, and he let himself cry. He thought he heard his dad say that he would be at the apartment in ten minutes, and he was vaguely aware of the dial tone being the only noise from the phone for a while, and possibly a knock at the door, but he was far too upset to really care.

Giles let himself in to the unlocked apartment, knowing he had done the right thing the second he caught sight of his son. He pulled the phone from the death-grip Spike had it in and placed the receiver back in its place. The room reeked of sex, and there was a very feminine pair of underwear on the rug by the couch. It didn’t take a genius to work out what had happened.

Giles hugged Spike until the tears stopped falling, and swore to himself that Xander Harris would be paying for hurting his son.

The End