Rating: umm.... very very mild sexual refs, but no swearing, no nekid bits, no violence, a bit of schmoop.
A/N: Just a short bit of fluff that popped into my head when I thought of a box of Twinkies...but it has nothing to do with Twinkies.
And Nene, you can have that bunny back untouched, I hit a tangent. Yes, again.
Summary: First, always first, Spike loved the mind. That was easy. The rest was more difficult to put into order.
Betaed by laazikaat
First, always first, Spike loved the mind. The quick wit, the smart-arse responses, the loyalty and bravery, the insecurity, the capacity to love a monster and accept even more love back. That was why he wouldn’t turn him. That human mind he loved first, and most, would be gone.
That was easy. The rest was more difficult for Spike to put into order.
He pushed Xander face down on the bed and straddled his thighs.
He loved the long, strong legs and the dark hair liberally sprinkled along their length. He loved the scars there too. Work scars, fight scars. Fang scars. Those he loved most. So much trust.
He loved the wide, rounded shoulders. They had carried so much more than a shovel or an axe. More scars here. All small, round twins. Shiny blind snakes eyes. All his. He kissed them.
He loved the thick arms. So thick he couldn’t wrap a hand fully around them. Strong enough to swing a weapon, strong enough to hold a vampire close and make him feel wanted, needed.
He loved the big hands. So much bigger than his. Big enough that two of them could cover his chest and infuse him with their warmth. Big enough that when they held Spike’s face, wrapped around his head, Spike rejoiced at how someone could touch him like this and he felt only adored, never vulnerable. He loved the strong hands that touched him with gentle affection and hungry passion.
All that strength, built from hundreds of hours of labour and patrol. It was there, hidden, and Spike decided he loved it second best.
He lifted off, rolled Xander over to his back and settled down on his legs.
Okay, not second best. Third.
It couldn’t compare with this. He loved the bright smile, the happy lines in the cheeks, the warmth in the deep brown eyes- there were different scars there but they were fading. He loved the crinkles at the corners of the eyes, and the frown lines between the brows when Xander concentrated. Those were the parts of the whole that made his unbeating heart wish it could leap. The whole that made him catch his breath even when he had none to catch. Who else had ever been so pleased to see him, every time they saw him? He held and kissed the happy face that he loved second best.
First the mind. Second the face. Third the strength. Yes. That was definitely the right order.
Spike’s fingertips trailed from the still smiling face, down the neck, past more pinprick scars that Xander’s eyes- and his friends' eyes- couldn’t see, but Spike could. Over the chest and the mat of hair, down the sides that would elicit-
“Hey, that tickles”
Spike leaned down and kissed the bit that tickled.
Fingers glided across the hips and up onto the belly and Spike knew without a doubt he’d gotten the order wrong again.
First the mind that made the man. Second the face that made Spike need to breathe. But the strength and power wasn’t third. There was something even better than that.
Spike was hard. He was defined. He was all angles and sharp-edged planes. He knew from Xander’s face that this was okay. He knew from Xander’s scent it was more than okay. But that was Xander’s order of things.
Spike’s third was what he didn’t have himself. Xander’s softness.
Fitness. Health. Muscles. Xander had all of those. And Spike loved it.
But he also had a soft spot for a soft spot- and Xander had that too. The perfect counterpoint to Spike.
He loved the belly. Spike leaned in and nipped. So soft and warm. He loved to lay his cheek against it and feel the gently yielding layer that covered the hard muscle beneath. He loved to feel the hairs brush against his lips. He loved to dip his tongue into the navel and see the tiny tremors shake his belly as Xander twisted and sometimes laughed and sometimes moaned under him.
He loved the hips. Spike’s hands wrapped around, careful not to dig in to the bit that tickled. He loved the way he could wrap his legs around Xander and not be jabbed by hip bones. He loved how, when that heavy body was above him, it moulded itself to his shape and he felt love in him and on him and all around him.
Soft and hard and Xander.
Putting all the parts in order wasn’t nearly as difficult as he’d first thought.
First was the mind. Second was the face. Third was the softness. Fourth was the strength.
Spike lay down and wrapped himself around the whole of Xander.
Yeah, now he had it right.
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