Rating: NC-17 For sex and strong language Warnings/Squicks: M/M
Slash, Light Angst, Soul!Spike Disclaimer: I own nothing but the smut. No infringement intended, none of the
characters used herein belong to me. But I wish they did! Feedback: Yes. Please!
Archiving: Just let me know where.
Unbeta'd fic, all mistakes are mine....
*Wanted to write a little something this weekend. Unfortunately babysitting my nephews for 3 days is not
conductive to writing hot smut. So please forgive the glossed over sex scene.*
Summary: “What’s it like, Spike? The blood. What does it taste like to you?” Xander asked slowly, moving closer
to watch a pink flush creep into Spike’s skin. “Like sin,” Spike answered in a whisper………
Xander watched as Spike carefully poured blood into a mug, then placed it just as carefully into the microwave, as
though to spill a single drop would be criminal in some way. The way he handled the mug as he lifted it to his
mouth was as smooth as a lover's caress and his lips pressed against the rim in a motion as sweet as true love's
Xander felt entranced as he watched Spike’s eyes blink shut as if in slow motion and when he pulled the mug away
from his mouth a single drop of crimson trailed from Spike’s lower lip, down to his chin, only to be caught by a
nimble tongue before it could course further along. Perhaps that drop, like Xander, had wished to follow the
delicate curve of Spike’s long, slender throat before drifting under the collar of his black t-shirt to travel
places un-known and seemingly un-knowable.
Spike; vampire, demon, immortal, as close to perfection as Xander could ever possibly imagine, hardly looked like a
killer, a taker of lives. Xander would be hard pressed to place any of those labels on the man in front of him.
Even sipping human blood from one of Xander’s favorite mugs, he looked like none of those things. Likewise his soul
seemed to shine no brighter than that of any other person Xander had ever met.
Soul, champion, hero. More words that described the impossibility that was Spike, but still no more obvious or
right or fitting than any word Xander could think of.
As Spike finished his liquid meal with small sounds of need and pleasure, Xander found himself becoming aware, of
thoughts, of stirrings, of emotions he had never thought to question before. He felt drawn to the mystery of Spike,
and found in himself the sudden need to ask what it was really like for him, for a vampire.
Xander stepped close as Spike downed the last drops and set the mug on the counter, slowly and meticulously licking
at the redness that now stained his plump and succulent lower lip.
“What’s it like, Spike? The blood. What does it taste like to you?” Xander asked slowly, moving closer to watch a
pink flush creep into Spike’s skin.
“Like sin,” Spike answered in a whisper that moved like crushed velvet over every fiber of Xander’s being. “Like
life,” he continued with a wary glance as Xander moved to within an arms length, “death, hope and sin.”
Xander sensed a melancholy in Spike that was never present in him pre-soul. Xander wanted to comfort him, cradle
Spike in his arms and share that sin with him. Demon, killer, vampire. Hurt, frightened, unsure. So many small
words, so many casual meanings and yet looking into Spike’s blue as the ocean eyes, and skin flushed with borrowed
blood, Xander could only see a simple longing reflected back at him. One that he himself was intimately familiar
with. The need to belong, the urge to be held without asking for it, the longing to be loved without expecting it.
All that and more, and Xander wanted to give it to him.
Slowly, as though approaching a skittish horse, Xander moved in towards Spike, unintentionally pinning him back
against the sink. “Why? Why sin, Spike?” he asked as gently as he could.
“Don’t deserve it, do I? Used to be a man. The kind of man that could never fathom the deeds I’ve done,” Spike said
quietly, avoiding Xander’s eyes, as he bared part of his soul to him. “Then I was the monster. Stalking innocents
and dealing death to any fool bloody stupid enough to cross my path,” he nearly spat out.
“Now I’m a monster…..with the soul of an innocent man. It’s no wonder I’m so soddin’ outta my mind sometimes. Can
taste life and inevitable death in every sip now, Xander. Can taste all my sins in every, single, drop,” Spike said
so softly and with the barest breath of a sob, that it had Xander reaching and pulling Spike close with an arm
wrapped around his waist.
“And because I am that monster, I have to drink. I fear death, Xander…..my death. So in order to keep me, this body
from becoming dust, I feed. And the worst part, luv, the worst of it is, it’s the soul making me drink human, not
the demon. They both want it, crave it, but for such completely different reasons. Demon’s not changed so much
really, it’ll always want human, because that’s what this body craves, what keeps it in good health as it were. But
the soul…..it wants me to taste that sin, over and over and over again,” he finished, burying his face in Xander’s
shoulder to hide his anguish.
Xander held tight to Spike’s shivering frame and gently smoothed his hand over Spike’s back, from the base of his
skull to the waist of his jeans, in long soothing strokes as he crooned and whispered sweet nothings into Spike’s
ear and pressed gentle kisses to the top of his head, ear and cheek.
“You’re not a monster Spike. Shhhh, no, you’re not, not any more. You’re my beautiful vampire. My friend, Spike.
You haven’t been a monster for a very long time,” Xander told him firmly as he lifted Spike’s head and met watery
blue eye’s with his own concerned brown ones.
Xander leaned in to Spike, wanting to kiss and comfort him, but Spike struggled away from him before their lips
could meet. His eye’s were wide and frightened and he lifted one hand to cover his mouth, while he whimpered and
murmured, ‘No, no! Bad! William is bad boy, no more sin. Don’t want anymore sin,’ to himself over and over again as
he cowered in a corner in the kitchen.
Xander felt horrible for pushing too far to fast. Did Spike even know he was bi? Realizing suddenly, he had only
come out this past summer, when Spike was gone. Shit! “Spike I’m sorry,” Xander said gently, keeping his distance
not wanting to crowd him again. “I’m sorry Spike, I shouldn’t have done that. I just, just wanted to kiss you, you
know, sorry. I won’t do it again, I didn’t mean to push, really.”
“I taste like sin, pet,” Spike said in a hollow voice, that sounded thin as torn tissue paper. “Don’t want to get
that on you! Bu…Buffy said I was a monster, didn’t want to believe her, but then I…..I hurt the girl. Don’t want to
hurt you too, luv! Couldn’t live with any more sin on my soul. It burns, Xander, it burns…” Spike trailed off, with
a fist clutching his shirt over his un-beating heart. The pleading tone of his voice begging Xander to
“No Spike,” Xander said, once he realized what Spike really meant. Xander gathered himself to confront Spike’s
ghosts, and knelt in front of him on the floor. Once again he reached for Spike, and this time he held him still,
as he closed the distance between them. Xander pressed his lips to Spike’s in a tender kiss, trying to show Spike
that he wasn’t afraid of him….or his sin. He parted his lips after a few moments, waiting for Spike to calm his
breathing before asking for more. He slowly ran his tongue along the seam of Spike’s closed mouth, urging him to
open, to let Xander in.
Slowly, cautiously, Spike let his resistance fall and let Xander slip past lips and teeth and felt the wonderful
sensation of Xander’s tongue caressing his. The taste of Xander’s mouth was so sweet and hit Spike so strongly as
to cause a single tear to slide past his steel resolve, unnoticed. Still he worried that he would damage this
wonderful man by letting him be tainted by his own sin.
On their knees in the kitchen, with Spike’s back pressed into the cabinet behind him, he had no escape and most
horrible of all, he didn’t want to escape. Xander was in control of this encounter, and when he felt Spike’s
resistance flair briefly, he moved an arm up Spike’s back to cradle his head in one hand. Xander threaded his
fingers into Spike’s downy soft hair, letting the ringlets and curls entwine every digit as he deepened the
Seconds or hours later, Xander pulled back to catch a few deep breaths. Spike looked at him with eye’s wide and
wondering, panting in unneeded breaths. Xander ran his tongue over his kiss swollen lips, eager to reclaim Spike’s
incredible mouth, but worried if he was taking too much for granted. Did Spike even want him? Xander worried for a
moment, that he was, after his promise not to push, somehow treating Spike like an object for the taking, instead
of the man he was quickly falling in love with.
Tenderly, Xander cupped and caressed one of Spike’s knife-like cheeks and felt his heart nicked by the movement.
How to explain all that he felt to this incredible creature. Spike was more myth and legend than man, and Xander
found himself wanting all of that and more as each day passed in Spike’s company.
“If that’s what your sin tastes like, Spike….I could devour every inch of you, just to taste it again,” Xander said
in a breathy voice. He slowly ran the thumb of the hand caressing Spike’s face over his lips, then nearly came when
Spike parted those exquisite lips and flicked his wet, pink, tongue over it eagerly. Xander moaned, as that simple
gesture told him that, no, Spike wasn’t being pushed into something he didn’t want.
Spike gracefully and suddenly lifted himself from the floor. Leaving Xander with the erotic picture of himself, on
his knees for Spike, a position he would eagerly duplicate as often as possible, just to hear Spike gasp like that
again. Xander titled his head back, to get a clear view of Spike’s face, before leaning in and nuzzling against the
growing bulge in Spike’s jeans.
Spike hissed in a breath, and brought his hands up to still Xander’s movements. But although Spike may have
captured his head, he had no way of restraining Xander’s hands, which were already sneaking up the inside of
Spike’s thighs, over his now straining erection and moving to play over belt and buttons.
“Let me taste your sin Spike,” Xander said calmly, eyes still locked on Spike’s. Spike moaned lightly and shut his
eyes as he nodded his acceptance. “Yes..…yes, Xander,” he breathed out, silent as a prayer. Xander nuzzled his face
against Spike’s groin again, before placing a chaste kiss over the growing damp spot on the front of his pants and
lifting himself to his feet. As eager as he might have been to have Spike, he was more eager to do this right.
Because as excitingly dirty as the prospect of sucking Spike off, on his knees on the kitchen floor, might have
been, the thought of taking him to bed and sharing a slow, sweet fuck with him was all that much more
Xander leaned into Spike and pressed their lips together in a quick kiss, before taking Spike’s hand and leading
him out of the kitchen, through the living room and into Xander’s bedroom.
The seemingly limitless energy, which was the signature of the vampire pre-soul, had been missing since his return
to Sunnydale. The normal snark and bounce, replaced with shyness and stuttered movements. Xander had always thought
it strange, that the one person among them that showed the most life in any situation, just happened to be the
resident dead-man in the group. And now, as Xander released Spike’s hand to begin undressing, he stood, still and
motionless, wide eyes watching Xander, with unnamable expressions flittering across his face.
Xander worried once again, that he was assuming too much in his own eagerness to bed Spike. After removing his
t-shirt and unfastening the button of his khakis, Xander moved close to Spike again. Taking his hand once more, he
lifted it to his face and ran his lips over Spike’s fingertips, before pressing a soft sucking kiss to his palm. “I
still want to taste your sin Spike,” he said softly, tenderly. “I want to hold you. I want to make love with you
Spike,” Xander said taking a deep breath and preparing to say the one thing he couldn’t have ever imagined saying
to Spike out loud. “I want to love you, Spike. Please. Let me love you?” he said looking into Spike’s eye’s,
begging him to understand that this was about so much more than comfort, sin, or friendship. To understand that
Xander already loved him and was wanting, hoping to have Spike’s love in return.
“Love?” Spike asked in a bewildered voice. “You want to, to….love me? Xander? What, why….” Spike couldn’t get any
more words out. No one had ever offered to love him before. No one had ever bothered to care, and so he knew he
must be dreaming this. Xander Harris; White Knight, white hat, and all around good guy with a heart as pure and
clean as the white-hot, burning center of the sun, could never love a monster such as him.
Xander watched as Spike started to pull back, and the glimmering hope in eyes was suddenly doused by the shadow of
doubt. Xander reached for him, desperate not to lose this chance. “I love you Spike,” Xander said fiercely as he
kissed Spike deeply, trying to infuse him with all the love that he felt. “I love you and I’m going to show you
that you’re not a monster, and that I love all your sins,” he said as he began undressing Spike.
Xander roughly lifted Spike’s arms and tore his t-shirt off over his head. He kissed and laved is way down Spike’s
neck, just as he had craved to do, what seemed like forever ago in the kitchen. He traveled a meandering path over
collar bones and shoulders, to firm pecks, stopping to nip and lick nipples to a pebbled hardness before sinking to
his knees again and licking over sculpted abs. He worked the buckle open on Spike’s belt and pulled it swiftly free
of belt loops, tossing it blindly behind him where it landed on the bed. He manipulated the many buttons of Spike’s
fly until he could follow the sparse line of golden hair down to the throbbing erection he freed as he pulled
Spike’s jeans down to pool around his bare feet.
The uncut perfection of Spike’s cock, curving ever so slightly to the left, had Xander gulping in excited breaths
and his mouth watering, at the idea of his tongue, at long last being able to taste. Xander gripped Spike’s hips to
steady himself as he leaned forward to taste the pre-come steadily leaking from the head of his cock. The foreskin
pulled back to show the glistening slit. Xander took the head into his mouth, slowly, trying to savor the taste of
Spike. The heady aroma of earth, salt and musk that was Spike, was infused in the very essence of him.
Xander moaned as the flavor of Spike exploded across his taste buds. The cool slickness of Spike’s cock, slowly
warming with the help of Xander’s breath and body heat. Spike shivered deliciously as Xander worked his tongue
under the foreskin and wrapped his lips around the head, gently laving with the flat of his tongue before poking
the tip into the narrow slit and coaxing more of Spike’s sweet sin into his mouth.
Spike reached with unsteady hands and tenderly caressed Xander’s hair and face. As Xander took him deeper he felt
himself growing bolder and reached with the fingers of one hand to feel the gentle O of Xander’s mouth where his
lips ringed Spike’s engorged cock. He moaned loudly as he felt Xander’s tongue peek out to taste a finger alongside
his cock, and trembled when Xander lowered his head as far down his length as he could before sucking strongly on
the up-stroke. And when Xander moved his hands over Spike’s where they rested in Xander’s hair he felt wonder as he
watched Xander’s eyes silently begging him for something more.
Xander closed Spike’s hands into fists in his own hair, and slowly moved Spike until he caught onto what Xander
wanted….for Spike to fuck his mouth. “Xan….Xander? Are you sure, pet? Don’t, Oh Gods! Don’t want to hurt you love,”
Spike managed to stutter out. Xander bobbed his head, signifying the silent, ‘Yes! Do it Spike,’ that his eyes had
been saying all along. “Alright, love. Just let me….” Spike trailed off as he kicked his jeans off from where they
had been tangled around his feet. He parted his legs and got a firmer grip in Xander thick, dark hair, holding his
head in place as he began to move his hips. Slowly at first, he didn’t want to damage the boy, but quickly gaining
confidence in Xander’s ability to breath through his nose and take him deeply, Spike began to thrust in
“Fuck, luv! You’re so fucking hot. God, I love your mouth Xander. Yeah pet, fucking wonder you are! Not gonna last
luv. Can you take it Xander? Will you drink me down, luv?” Spike asked as he felt his body tense, and his balls
draw up readying for release. Xander moaned and grunted his approval as Spike flooded his mouth. He eagerly drank
it down, swallowing as much of Spike’s cool come as he could, although a few dribbles leaked from his mouth and
trickled onto his own bare chest. He suckled at Spike’s still half hard cock, licking and sucking every drop from
him, and secretly wishing for more.
When Xander reluctantly released his prize, Spike collapsed against him and sank to his knees next to him on the
floor. They were both panting, trying to calm themselves before speaking. Xander peppered Spike’s neck with tiny
biting kisses, hard and wanting, but willing to wait.
“You alright Xander?” Spike asked concerned after a few long moments of silence. Xander was curled
against him, naked, silent and looking wonderfully debauched with eyes half closed, taking deep shuddering breaths.
“Just, was it all right? Did I hurt you? Don’t want to hurt you, luv. Don’t want to dirty you….with my sin.” he
“You didn’t hurt me Spike. I wanted that, needed it. The way you taste…..it’s like heaven to me! I loved it. If
that’s what your sin tastes like, then I want to spend the rest of my life drinking it from you,” Xander said,
pulling Spike into his arms and lifting his chin to make him meet his eyes. “I’m not innocent Spike, I‘ve done
horrible things that I will always regret. But I’m not made of stone either. You can hurt me….if you don’t want me,
if you don’t love me, if you ever leave me. Those things will hurt me, but they won’t kill me. Your past is your
past Spike. I love you as the man I’ve known for the last six years. The one I met and fantasized about since I was
sixteen. The one that tried to kill me and my friends, that slept with Anya and loved Buffy enough to get a soul. I
want all of you Spike, past, present and most definitely future. I want you. I’m in love with you. I love the taste
of your sin on my lips,” Xander finished with a deep passionate kiss.
“I want you Xander, never knew how much I wanted you till now. But how could you love me, pet? I was bloody
horrible to you, hell, I hurt you almost as much as Buffy. I want to believe you luv, but I just don’t understand.”
Spike said still bewildered by Xander’s declarations of love.
Xander wanted to make this easy for Spike, to be able to show him when he fell in love with him. To be able to
pinpoint an exact moment or reason that made him fall, but the truth was he had always wanted Spike. Ever since
Angel had offered him up as a snack, Xander had fantasized about Spike. He had epic day-dreams about him in class,
or at work exploring the ‘what ifs‘. What if Spike had accepted, but turned him instead of making him a meal. Would
they be together like Spike had been with Drusilla? What if when Spike had kidnapped him and Willow it had been
Spike he was caught kissing. What if when he tied Spike to that chair in his basement, he had done more than wiggle
his ass at him teasingly. What if instead he had stripped down and crawled up to sit in Spike’s lap, opened his fly
and sank down onto Spike’s cock. Or what if, for some reason, Spike had fallen for Xander instead of Buffy?
All these thoughts had tormented Xander from teenager to adulthood, and he’d often taken out his frustrations on
the vampire that had caused them in the first place. Verbally tormenting him and tearing him down after the chip.
Threatening Spike when he fell for Buffy. Trying to hurt him when he slept with Anya…..instead of him. How could he
explain all this to Spike now?
“How can I make you understand Spike? Tell me and I’ll do it, because I’m not sure how to get through to you.
You’re not imagining me being in love with you. I am and I think a part of me always has been. It’s why I was such
a dick to you all those times, so I could try to hide how I felt about you. Because I knew you’d never feel the
same about me and I was stupid Spike. Last year I couldn’t get married, because there were still so many ‘what ifs’
left in my mind, and when you slept with Anya….I was pissed. Because you went to her for comfort, because you
didn’t see me, didn’t need me that way. Fuck, I wish I knew how to put this in vampire terms for you Spike. Maybe
then I could make you understand……” Xander trailed off as though an idea were forming in his mind as he spoke.
Xander quickly shoved his hands into the pockets of his khakis, searching, knowing it was still there, having not
changed after work. Instead becoming entranced by Spike in the kitchen. Yes! Xander quickly flicked open the small
pocket knife he carried for work, and cut a shallow line down his forearm before Spike could even comprehend what
Spike went into game face at the smell of fresh human blood. The slight crunch of bone and shifting to ridges
exciting Xander on some baser level that he couldn’t understand. But hoping that this might let Spike believe him.
Xander rose and moved to stand close to Spike, he lowered his bleeding arm in front to Spike's lips, while using
his other hand to caress the oddly smooth and soft ridges of his true face.
Xander’s tender touch and bloody forearm had Spike hopeful and confused all at once, until Xander spoke. “I love
you Spike. You’re not a monster, not to me. I want all of you Spike. I want to make you mine, in some primal way
that I can’t even describe, and I want to be yours. I want it all Spike, all your sin, all your love, everything!
Have me Spike, please. Have me,” Xander said pushing his wound against Spike’s mouth and holding his breath waiting
for the bite.
Spike looked up at Xander, and saw nothing but truth and love in his eyes, and suddenly found himself unable to
hold back any longer. Shaking out of game face, he moved to standing and gently pulled Xander to the bed, sitting
them down and laving over the shallow cut. The taste of Xander’s blood rocked him, sweetness, innocence, love,
trust and want, were all so clear in that small taste. It flowed into Spike and had him purring lightly at the
unexpected gift he had received from this man. Spike cleaned the cut free of blood, certain that it would heal
quickly. He could feel Xander waiting for the bite and although Spike wanted to, he needed to explain a few a
things to his lover first. Lover?
Spike looked closely at Xander and smelled no fear or apprehension, just lust and want. It overrode Spike's senses,
the heady smell pushing him to take all that Xander was offering. He pulled Xander close, kissing him deeply,
growling playfully when Xander nipped at his bottom lip sharply. Spike ran his hands over Xander’s bare chest and
stomach, wanting to sink into his heat. He stroked over the straining fabric of Xander’s khakis, rubbing his
erection with one hand while pushing him to lie back on the bed with the other. Spike continued rubbing and groping
as he began to suckle at first one nipple and then the other, pausing only long enough to quickly remove Xander’s
pants and boxers in one fluid movement.
Spike's eyes roamed over Xander’s body, scorching him with the fierce possessiveness they held as they lingered
over neck, torso and groin. Spike crouched over Xander, laying claim to him, with hands, and tongue and teeth.
Sucking up a large welt over Xander's carotid, just where he would place his claim mark when the time was
Xander moaned, panted and begged as Spike moved over him. Never staying long on one area before moving onto the
next, and still not touching Xander’s dick as he worked him into a frenzy. When Spike finally moved up for another
kiss, Xander grabbed him and held him still for a moment.
"Oh god…I want you, Spike. Please….please, want to feel you inside. Please, need you……but I haven’t….I haven’t done
this before Spike,” Xander panted out, needing Spike to know everything. “I’ve never bottomed before Spike. I
always wanted it to be you, so I never did it,” he said embarrassedly.
Once again Spike was shocked and amazed by his boy. That he had never allowed anyone to enter him, wanting and
waiting for Spike, had him shivering in anticipation. “Fuck, Xander, I’ve never known anyone like you. Never had
anyone want me this much. Thank you love. Gonna make it so good for you pet, promise. Won’t hurt you Xan, could
never hurt you, might make you scream though,” Spike said, starting to feel a little of his cocky nature returning
to him, at the prospect at taking Xander’s cherry.
Spike moved down Xander’s body until he was face to hard leaking cock. He dipped down to taste the small puddle of
pre-come that had gathered on Xander’s belly. The flavor was exquisite, rich and heady, salty and sweet….perfect.
Spike moved lower still, bypassing Xander’s thick length, not wanting him coming too soon. Better to save it, to
distract the boy with, while he entered him. Spike nuzzled at his bollocks, sucking first one and then both into
his mouth, rolling them against his tongue, enjoying the shallow panting breaths Xander was suddenly taking.
Xander felt like an idol being worshiped. The way Spike touched and fondled his body, made him feel cherished and
wanted in a way he had never experienced before. If he could have just one thing more to make the experience
even better, it would have been to have a magical mirror on the ceiling, so that he could watch Spike’s lithe,
sensuous body moving over and around him. He knew that he, himself would look like a debauched virgin if he were to
see himself at that moment. Legs spread wide, one outstretched, curving over Spike’s back, holding him in place,
the other bent at the knee, tucked up close to his body. He had one arm thrown carelessly above his head, absently
fondling the leather of Spike’s belt, where it had earlier landed, and the other wrapped in Spike’s hair, urging
When Spike’s tongue teased between his ass cheeks, Xander gasped, and lifted his hips, chasing after that wandering
muscle. Spike moved his hands under Xander’s ass, spreading him with long slender fingers, and licking over
Xander’s puckered entrance. He pressed long wet stripes over it with his tongue, then moved to placing sucking
kisses on and around it before finally giving into Xander’s quiet begging, and slowly pushing in as far as he
“Yes! Ohh, fucking hell, Spike. More please, don’t….don’t stop. You feel so good Spike. GOD, fuck, yes! So
good….you’re so good. Love your fucking tongue Spike. Can’t wait to feel you in me….Love you!” Xander chanted and
cried as Spike opened and stretched him with his tongue, not even noticing the finger that started pressing in, as
Spike continued to work him into a shuddering puddle of goo.
Spike worked his middle finger in past the guardian ring, watching as Xander’s greedy body pulled it in and held it
tight in its hot grip. Xander whimpered lightly when Spike moved his body up over him, but only until Spike’s
talented finger glided over his prostate. Then he screamed. Lights, like floating stars, and spots, like staring at
the sun too long appeared along his vision, and he silently thanked Danny Mendelson, for explaining the prostate
gland to him.
Spike continued to stretch and push, pull, twist his finger, but needed lube before he could add another. “Didn’t
think to bring any slick with me, pet. Do you have anything we could use?” Spike asked huskily, hoping his boy had
something, because he didn’t think he could stop, and blood was never a good lubricant, though it would do in a
pinch. Xander nodded and pointed at the nightstand next to the bed, barely coherent enough to think and unable to
speak just yet. Spike wriggled his finger over that amazing spot again, not removing it even as he reached, with
his other hand, to pull the drawer open in the small table. Spike moved his hand about inside, searching for the
lube, and pulled it back with a few other surprises as well. The blood red leather cock ring he found would be put
to good use in the future. The fleshy dildo he felt while digging for the lube would be sure to bring an amusing
flush to Xander’s face when he questioned him about it later. But the leather cuffs and ball gag were what had
him the most intrigued.
“Got a little kink, do we pet?” Spike asked while curving his tongue behind his teeth. “You use these on someone
before, luv? Someone you brought to this bed?” Spike asked with growing jealousy. Xander shook his head no,
struggling to make his mouth work again. “Someone use them on you then?” he asked with a soft growl. Xander could
see golden sparks, lighting the depths of Spike’s eyes, and finally won control over his body enough to speak.
“Anya….bought them for me as a coming out gift. Never used them Spike. Wouldn’t mind trying them out sometime….”
Xander joked lightly, with a light flush of embarrassment coloring his cheeks.
Spike shook the worry from his mind, feeling ridiculous for getting jealous because of a few toys. “Sorry pet,
just….the thought of you with someone else……” Spike trailed off, unable to finish the thought.
“Spike, there’s never been anyone else for me. I’ve only slept with one guy before you. Right after high school I
wanted to see the world and ended up stranded in Oxnard instead. I met a guy, we had a few drinks after a bad night
at work….We were only together once, he was sweet, showed me a few things about myself I never wanted to see
before. A week later my car got fixed and I came home. That’s it. The story of my lost summer, I’ve never even told
the girls about it. You know every relationship I’ve ever had, I’ve just sort of fallen into, mostly because it was
easier that being alone. But not you, I chose you Spike, I want you….only you,” Xander said seriously.
Spike couldn’t help the sappy grin that spread over his face and pushed against Xander’s prostate again hoping to
keep him from noticing it. Spike pulled his hand back and liberally coated two fingers with lube before pushing
into Xander’s tight channel again.
Xander was riding on a cloud of lust, the feel of Spike filling and stretching him, had him wriggling and
moaning like a cheap whore. “Feels so good Spike. I need you. Fuck me Spike, please.….please, fuck me!”
Spike ignored Xander’s pleas and pushed in a third finger, wanting his love to know only bliss, passion and
pleasure, not pain. He spread his fingers, widening and preparing the way for his cock. When he felt that Xander
was ready for him he pulled his hand away, accompanied by the pitiful whines of his lover. “Going to make you feel
so bloody good pet. You’ll feel me inside for days love. Every time you move, you’ll feel where I’ve been, and
you’ll beg me to fill you again,” Spike crooned his litany of verbal sex, as he pushed a pillow under Xander’s ass,
then lubed his own hard and aching cock.
Spike lined himself up with Xander’s twitching hole, gently, teasingly, rubbing the head of his cock over it,
making Xander shiver and shudder, and start his begging anew. Slowly Spike pushed in past the tight ring of muscle,
and stilled, allowing Xander time to adjust to the feeling. Moving slowly, not wanting to hurt his love, it seemed
to take forever before becoming fully seated inside Xander’s body. Buried to the hilt in slick, tight, heat, Spike
stilled his movements for a moment, needing time to calm or this would all be over far too soon.
Xander loved the feel of Spike’s cock sheathed inside him, sliding deeper with every movement until Xander felt a
fullness, a wholeness he could never have imagined before. Waiting for Spike to move, to fuck and fill him Xander
began begging, urging Spike on. “Spike….please, move. I need more….. Fuck me Spike. Feel so incredible inside me.
More please, need you to fuck me, want to feel you. Now.” he begged and pouted at his lover until Spike began to
Spike pulled back, slowly, oh so slowly, before thrusting smoothly back in. Twisting, Xander rolled slightly onto
his left side, Scissoring his legs, one under and between Spike’s clenching thighs, the other over Spike’s
shoulder. Spike tightened his grip on Xander’s leg and started fucking, and thrusting in earnest. Xander’s panting
pleas enough to break him into game face once again. The scorching heat of Xander’s body, driving him crazy,
burning him up like the sun.
“Oh god! Yes, Spike. So close,” Xander shouted as Spike wrapped a hand around his too long ignored cock, nearly
pushing him over the edge and into orgasm. Spike’s rhythm, hard and driving, speared Xander to the mattress. Their
voices raised to a thundering crescendo, topped by a haunting and furious growl from Spike, as he began to climb to
a bone shattering climax.
Xander locked his deep, lust filled eye’s with Spike’s golden one’s, before tilting his head back, baring his neck
enticingly, encouraging him to bite. “I love you Spike,” he panted out, reaching out to caress the ridges over his
brow and stroking the bridge of his nose. “I want all of you….please. Take all of me Spike, I’m yours.”
Spike’s golden gaze flicked from Xander’s eye’s to the curve of his neck. Too close to the edge to stop now, Spike
thrust roughly forward into Xander once more. Leaning over him, Spike licked a path from a peaked nipple, upwards
towards Xander’s throat, pausing only a moment before deftly, almost tenderly sinking his fangs into Xander’s
yielding flesh. The heady taste of warm, fresh blood, flowing into him finally pushed Spike over the edge, tumbling
headlong into a shuddering release.
At the feel of fangs pressing against his neck, Xander felt his body tense, readying for the bite. A sharp quick
pain, and then the erotic sucking, pulling, licking of Spike’s mouth, forced him into heart stopping orgasm. Jets
of hot, pulsing come coated Spike’s hand and Xander’s belly. His body clenching and gripping around Spike, tearing
another animalistic growl from him.
Spike licked over the puncture wounds he had created, savoring the last few drops of Xander’s blood that lingered
there, Spike realized that something incredible had just happened. He pulled back to look in wonder at Xander’s
beautiful face, which he touched and kissed lovingly while Xander calmed his ragged breathing.
“Thank you love,” Spike said, with a hint of amazement in his voice.
“For what, Spike?” Xander asked, as he pulled Spike down next to him, to cuddle sleepily.
“For loving me, Xander. For helping me, wanting me. It’s more than I deserve, pet…..more than I could have ever
hoped for. For being mine. You are, you know?” Spike asked, looking into Xander’s half closed eye’s.
“What, Spike? I am….what?” Xander asked curiously.
“Mine, luv. You’re mine…..Forever. Not letting you go, pet. You taste like life and love, like eternity.” he said,
still amazed at the way so much had changed so soon.
“Do I taste like sin, Spike?” Xander asked with a hint of worry.
"Yes. You taste like the most sinful delicacy I’ve ever tasted. Bloody marvelous, it is. Yes my love, you taste