This is a humour fic. Ass and morning after humour.
Warning: Xander's ass may've been harmed in the writing of this fic.

Beta'd by and dedicated to [info]kitty_poker1 because I don't have an official birthday fic for her and this'll have to do till I can actually think up and write a decent schmoop-fest, lmao.

If All Morning Afters Were Like This...


Xander groaned and twitched and regained consciousness abruptly, much like he always did, but this time was somehow different.

He blinked and stretched and then winced as pain shot through his ass and his head simultaneously. He felt himself gagging as he pressed his fingers to his temples and breathed through the nausea.

Oh, damn, hang-over. His head felt like it was going to crack open like an egg. Not a good feeling.

What in Wolverine's name was wrong with his butt??

"Good God, what the hell? Why does my ass hurt? Oh, God, and does it hurt," he whimpered, turning onto his side and curling up into a ball. His head pounded in tandem with the mysterious pain in his backside.

Why did his ass feel like it was on fire?

Wait. His ass felt like--?


He reached tentatively behind him, trying not to move unnecessarily because of his cotton-filled, throbbing skull that felt too tight for his brain, and his gut twisted as his fingers came into contact with the swollen, hot flesh between his buttocks.

He started to hyperventilate.

The other side of the bed moved and his eyes widened. His lungs stilled as he held his breath.

Xander froze as the other person shifted closer and wrapped around him. When a hard cock touched his abused ass hole he screeched and leapt from the bed...

...and fell onto his tail bone, causing his posterior further pain.

The breath left him; he was frozen. He was in so much pain he couldn't think.

He collapsed onto his back and some of the pressure left his abused anus. He stared blankly up at the ceiling.

The bed creaked and a smirking blond vampire looked down at him, smugly running a hand down his own flat stomach and smacking his lips contentedly. "Never had that particular reaction after a night of good fun before...interesting, really."

"Shut up, Spike. I don't know what happened last night but...shut up."

Spike's eyebrows rose and he sat up.

Xander's eyes flickered to Spike and he got an eyeful of naked vampire cock and naked vampire balls...and everything else in that generally not talked about area.

"Oh, God, you're naked. There's a naked vampire in my bed and my ass hurts and...that can't be good. I'm so never drinking again. I should've remembered: beer bad. If it could happen to Buffy it could happen to me. This is so much worse than what happened to her."

Spike brought one knee up and propped his chin on it, grinning. "Don't tell me you don't remember our all night romp of manly buggering,'ll hurt my poor, little, fragile feelings..."

Xander groaned. "I did not have sex with you. There's gotta be a logical explanation for this. Like..."

Well, he had nothing. He was desperately grasping at straws that weren't even there.

He was so screwed. He had been so screwed. Mental whimper.

Spike smirked outright and ticked things off on his fingers. "You and me naked in bed together. Your bum hurts. There's lube on the side table, which I'm sure you still feel in your ass along with...some other fluids. Our clothes are strewn all over the floor willy nilly, like. Hmm...dunno. Quite the bloody mystery, innit?"

"Oh, God." Xander's throat closed up and then he got to his feet as quickly as he could and hobbled into the bathroom before he did something really embarrassing like cry -- or throw up -- in front of Spike.

Spike was right, though...he could feel sticky wetness between his cheeks, could feel where...vampire jizz had dried on the inside of his thighs when it had leaked from him at some point after the...fucking.

He shoved his fist into his mouth.

"You ever want to give it another go, just let me know. You've got a sweet ass, Harris. Tight and hot and fluttering. You're very enthusiastic and willing to do what it takes to get the job done. Not a half bad fuck."

Xander slammed the door and huddled under water nearly hot enough to melt the skin from his bones.

He nearly began sobbing when he scratched the dried cum from his belly, scoring red welts on his skin to get. it. off. Evidently, he'd enjoyed what happened last night because Spike had had him and...came in him so what was on his stomach? Had to be his own semen.


He could barely look himself in the eyes when he propped himself against the sink in front of the mirror to brush his teeth. He was embarrassed, ashamed, mortified...Christ, how could he let Spike fuck him?

Why didn't he remember it?

More importantly: why the hell did he let Spike fuck him?!

How did Spike do it, anyway? Didn't that chip jolt him a good one if he caused even the smallest pain to a human? Judging from the soreness of his ass...well, it had to have hurt. It hurt now.

Xander's eyes flickered up to meet his reflection's and he saw himself differently.

Besides the dark circles under his bloodshot, pain-filled, shocked eyes he looked like a man who'd been fucked in the ass -- to him, anyway.

He wondered if people would be able to tell he was no longer a stranger to gay sex when they saw him.

He shook himself, spat, dried off and with a deep breath turned around and pulled his buttocks apart.

"Holy crap!" he yelped as he saw the swollen mess. "Holy crap," he repeated, eyes bulging. "It looks like another set of lips! That is not what a normal ass hole is supposed to look like!"

How the hell was he going to take a shit? People in the next state would be able to hear him!

Maybe he could get some...softener stuff or...

"You fall in, boy?"

Xander jumped and then groaned when he realised he didn't have any clothing in here with him. "Go away, Spike. You've had your fun...evidently had me too and I don't even know how you did it, you bastard, better keep quiet or I'll fucking stake you. Hear me?"

Silence, then, "I hear you," Spike purred. "You'll stake me with your big, hard piece of wood. Guess it's only fair it's your turn next. I did all the pounding last night. Wouldn't mind getting nailed if you want another go..."

Xander made a sound to articulate his absolute helplessness at the situation.

"You all right? Sounded like one of them...Wookie things from Star Wars."

"You already defiled me, you sonofabitch, don't talk about Star Wars like that. Get out!"


Minutes later, Xander stomped out -- or stomped as much as the pulsing throb between his buttocks would allow -- and threw on the softest boxers he had, adding sweatpants on top because any kind of rough material would probably kill him...or make him screech like a girl.

Then again, maybe he wanted to be dead. It would be easier than facing...this.

He was sitting on his bed, leaning on one cheek tying his shoelaces when the vampire that had deflowered and defiled him came back into the bedroom, thankfully dressed.

Spike leaned against the door jamb, looking all kinds of smug in his painted on jeans and skin tight t-shirt. "You done having your little fit?"

"I didn't have a fit," Xander denied, glaring up at him once he'd finished his laces. He stood up slowly, stance wide, head aching, stomach unsettled and roiling. He put a hand to it and massaged. "Not that I don't have a really damn good reason to have one. How the hell did this happen? I don't remember a thing...why the hell would you fuck me? You hate me. But that's not the most important thing. How the hell did you fuck me when you have that chip in your head? Why the hell would I fuck you?!"

Spike's eyes narrowed as he moistened his lips and rubbed his fingernails down the front of his t-shirt before holding his hand out and examining the chipped polish absently. "Got drunk, shagged, that's about it. As for me not hurting you? Well..." Spike looked up, grinning, "...I'm just that good. You seemed to enjoy it quite a lot if all the yellin' and screamin' and cummin' so hard you blacked out had anything to say about it."

Xander squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his hands into fists. "You'll be gone when I open my eyes because this is a hallucination brought on by copious amounts of alcohol and I swear I'm never drinking again."

His eyes popped open and a whine escaped his throat.

The vampire was still there and looked amused.

"Oh, this sucks."

"Not what you said last night."

"I'm leaving. You be gone before I get back. I don't...need this right now. I just broke up with Anya and I could be cursed and Oh, my this my curse?"

"Been called a lot of things..." Spike's eyes narrowed again as he straightened. "But a curse isn't one of them. Bloody blessing, I am. You're lucky to have had me. Should be bowing at my feet, begging for more. Many blokes would give their left bollock to have had a chance to get with this," he said, cupping his groin suggestively.

"Oh, get over yourself already. If I don't remember it...well, it couldn't have been that good. Now, if you'll excuse me I gotta be at Giles' for the Scooby meeting. You just...feel free to get the hell out."

Xander's bow-legged gait ruined his dramatic exit but he ignored the snickering that followed him because he was the one in the right and Spike was just a prick.


He started to slam his door shut but then forced himself to close it with a soft click. He figured he'd disturbed the neighbors enough for one day.

He got in the elevator, started to push the down button, then saw his elderly neighbor Mrs. Jackson tottering down the hall with her cane and a purse that weighed nearly as much as she did hanging from the crook of her elbow, banging against one hip.

He sighed, held the doors for her and smiled wanly when she grinned up at him from behind large-framed glasses.

"What floor, Mrs. Jackson?"

"Bottom floor. I'm going to get my prescriptions filled today and I need to head to the grocery store. And I've told you repeatedly, Xander, to call me Mary."

Xander shuffled, winced, and decided to stand still. "Okay. Mary."

He hit the button and they were headed down.

After a moment, Mary peered up at him. "You doing okay, young man?"

Xander frowned, leaning on the rail secured to the wall with feigned nonchalance. "Yeah, I'm okay."

"All that noise last night...sounded like a dying cat."

Xander gulped and felt his skin flushing red. "I-I'm fine, Mrs--Mary."

The old woman suddenly grinned, her pale, gray eyes twinkling. "From the sound of it...that dying cat went happy."

His mouth fell open but thankfully they were at the ground floor, elevator doors dinging open, and he escaped, forcing himself to walk evenly as he nearly ran for the exit.


He shook himself, straightened his shirt, stiffened his spine and went into Giles' apartment. The girls and Giles were in the living room, seated on the couch and arm chairs and going through dusty, old books.

Oh, that looked like fun.

He sighed and carefully made his way over and perched on the arm of the sofa sideways.

"So...what's up?"

"We're looking up some boring stuff about the demon I'm supposed to kill. Feel free to help and put me out of my misery," Buffy muttered without looking at him.

Giles huffed and got up to go to the kitchen. "That 'boring stuff' will ensure that you actually kill it and not help it re-form into twenty new demons if you misguidedly chopped it into tiny pieces as you no doubt would like to do. Would anyone care for a beverage while I'm up?"

"I'll take a soda," Xander murmured.

"If you're making tea...I'd l-like some," Tara said just loudly enough for Giles to barely hear it from the kitchen.

"Yeah, me too," Willow piped up, suddenly raising her head and looking at Xander. She smiled. "Hiya! Haven't seen you since...well, the you know what. How are you doing? Anya's...packing."

Xander's chest constricted. "Yeah...well. I guess she gets to do whatever she wants since I was the one that broke it off." He shrugged. "It wasn't going to last. Better to end it now without too much hassle than wait till...what? The wedding day to jilt her at the altar and thus embarrass her, my family, and possibly cause her and her vengeance-y friends to curse me in some horrible way?"

Buffy finally looked up and smiled at him kindly. "It's okay. We understand."

Xander narrowed his eyes. "You never liked her, did you?"

Buffy blinked and shared a glance with Willow. "Not so much, no," they said in unison.

Xander sighed. "Sometimes, I didn't either. It was just...comfortable and better than being alone. Sort of just got...settled in a place that ending up being habit more than anything. You know?"

"I totally get that. Though," Buffy added, thoughtfully, "I haven't even gotten to have a comfortable rut in a while..."

"You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. You're only human and we humans were born to make mistakes. It's how we learn."

"Yeah, right." He cleared his throat. "Thanks, Giles," Xander said, meeting the older man's eyes as he held out a soda in front of his face.

Giles nodded and went back to the kitchen to retrieve the girls' tea.

"So? You were pretty loopy at The Bronze last night..."

Xander spewed soda all over Buffy's arm when she reached out to put the book she was reading back on the coffee table and exchange it for another. She made a face and wiped at her damp skin.

"Eww, Xander. Gross. Say it, don't spray it."

"Sorry, Buff. Uh, Willow, you were saying?"

Willow took a sip of her tea. "You seemed pretty down and don't usually drink that much. Did Spike get you back to your place okay?"

Good thing Xander wasn't drinking this time because he'd surely have given Buffy another shower if he had.

Swallowing hard, he laughed weakly. "Yeah. I woke up there and everything." He shifted and nearly jumped off the arm of the couch when it came into contact with his aching backside.

Willow saw the wince. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Buffy looked up with her pretty green eyes and then he had two sets of green and two blue looking at him.

Okay, this wasn't fun. He'd always thought being the center of attention would be...nice for a change but it so wasn't.

He'd have shifted uncomfortably but...well, his ass hurt too much and he didn't want to draw more attention to it.

"Uh, kind of. Not a work or patrol related thing, umm..." Think fast, Xan-man! "...I've got a hemorrhoid," he blurted.

Silence. Pained grimaces. Twitching lips. Someone smothered a snicker.

He slowly flushed.

Giles cleared his throat. "As...pertinent as that is to our search...have you, er, tried Preparation H?"

Everyone turned to stare at him. His hands fluttered in his lap. "What?"

"So don't want to know," muttered Buffy.

"As I wasn't going to tell you, that won't be a problem. If you're having such...discomfort," Giles turned to Xander, "then you should go to the chemist's and have a look at...the personal hygiene aisle. They've many kinds of...creams and the like to choose from that would help with, tenderness."

Xander would've been amused at Giles' embarrassment if it wasn't caused by his own, so he just stood up stiffly, thanked them all and left with as much dignity as a guy walking like he had something stuck up his ass could.

He wondered if those Preparation H wipes he'd seen on tv would work for his sore, abused ass hole.


Preparation H wipes and hemorrhoidal cream and stool softener was what he came home with.

The trip to the supermarket hadn't been a fun one.

The cashier had snickered, he'd nearly had to duck for cover when people passed by the hygiene aisle and his ass hurt so badly he no longer cared he was walking funny.

He made his way slowly back to his apartment, didn't meet anyone on the way up, thank Christ, and discovered an empty place when he unlocked the door.

He sighed and dropped his keys on the counter, then shuffled his way into the bathroom with his purchases.



Xander blinked as he stood under the harsh lighting in his bathroom and stared at his own bemused expression.

He felt cool and refreshed and not so sore down there now. He could even tell the swelling had gone down a little and it had only been about five minutes since he'd begun to apply the cream.

He tentatively walked around, naked from the waist down, and managed not to grimace or wince too much.

At this rate he'd be healed in a matter of days. He'd really only have to be careful when he sat down or tried to go to the bathroom.


He sighed with relief and put his clothes back on, then packaged up the stuff and shoved it beneath his sink.

Then he went and got a beer and laid down on his couch -- on his stomach -- to watch some mindless television to get his thoughts off...what had happened.


Xander laughed drunkenly, stumbled, and clung to Spike for dear life as the vampire led him back to his apartment. He watched the moonlight bounce off platinum hair and raised a hand to pat it.

"Pretty. Shiny. It's like white gold and sunshine."

Spike laughed. "You're more than three sheets...think you're about seven to the wind. C'mon, we're almost there. Gotta get you tucked away into bed like a good little boy should be."

Xander sighed and pressed his face into Spike's neck. He walked unevenly, crookedly, but went where Spike led him. He felt as if he was floating, and the elevator took them up to his apartment, which totally made sense.

"Smell good."

"You're very...tactile when you're drunk."

"Huh? I just like touching you, Spike."

"Where are your keys?" Spike asked, ignoring him.

"Dunno." Slow blink. "Keys to what?"

Spike rolled his eyes and then began to search Xander's pockets.

Xander giggled and wriggled in Spike's grasp. He gasped when his hips came into contact with Spike's thigh...then he thrust again on purpose. "Oh, that's good."

Spike froze and pulled the keys from Xander's pocket. "Are you humping my leg?"

"No." Xander did it again, then opened his mouth and licked Spike's neck. The vampire shuddered and dropped the keys. "I'm just...humping your leg. Okay, yeah, I am. Shhh, it's a secret. This feels good."

Spike craned his head. "You're not that drunk, are you?"

Xander blinked at him owlishly, then nodded so hard he nearly fell down. "Yep."

Spike's mouth widened into a grin. He neatly pushed Xander away, grabbed the keys and unlocked the door, ushering the drunken boy inside.

Bolting the door, he tossed the keys away, took off his duster and practically shoved Xander into the bedroom.


"Oh,'re so bloody hot and tight...good thing you're so drunk and relaxed or I'd never be able to stick anything up your tight little virgin ass."

Xander panted, spread his legs wider and leaned on his forearms because he was too tired to keep his heavy head up. He moaned as Spike's fingers touched something sparkly deep inside.

"What's that?"

"Special happy place all good little boys get to play with if they're...good."

"Oh." Xander shoved his forehead into the mattress and canted his hips. "I'm a good boy. I'm really good. Do it again. Please?"



Spike winced and clutched his forehead with one hand, freezing in place half-way inside Xander. "Bloody hell! Don't tense up, it makes it worse."

Xander whimpered and tried to loosen his taut muscles. "But it hurts! I don't want to do this anymore. I want to sleep. I'm tired."

"Sod that. You started this and I'm sodding well going to finish it. Just...don't think about it. Relax and let me make you feel good. It'll feel better in a bit. Just...don't clam up like this the whole time. It's not that bad."

Xander shuddered. "You don't know. You're not face down on your hands and knees with a penis up your ass, you big-dicked bastard."

Spike chuckled amidst all his pain and finally breathed a sigh of relief once the spasm was over. He took Xander's hips in his hand and edged forward slowly.

One hand left the boy's hip and trailed down to touch where they met. Cool fingers massaged the stretched flesh as Spike eased inside a little more.

"That's...kinda nice," Xander murmured, muscles finally melting.

Spike groaned and was finally completely inside. He hovered over Xander's back, then finally spread his own legs and leaned down over him, resting on one hand. The other massaged the sweet, hot, tight flesh gripping him.

"You ready yet?"

Xander's eyes were heavy, his breathing shallow and quick. "I guess you can fuck me..."

Spike smirked, eased back and pushed forward...then repeated that a few times until he could move smoothly and more quickly. He changed the angle of his thrusts and Xander convulsed beneath him. "You only guess?"

Xander inhaled sharply. "Umm...okay. You can. You really, really can. Fuck me and shut up."

"That, I can do."


Xander woke up with a wet spot in the front of his sweats and drool dripping down his cheek into his ear.

With a grimace he wiped it away and sat up and then squealed like a little girl, having forgotten about his ass problem.


His eyes widened as he remembered his dream.

Or, well, flashback, really, he supposed, because his subconscious wasn't that creative, that detailed.

He swallowed hard, burying his face in his hands. "Oh, God, I started it. He'll never let me live this down." His entire body shook. "I can't believe I seduced Spike and took it from him up the ass." Then, he wailed, miserably, "And I liked it!"


Hours later, he was staring into space, the blank television screen seeming to mock him.

Someone pounded on the door, startling him.

He braced himself on the couch and this time didn't re-injure himself as he moved.

He glared at the stark whiteness of the door and the distance between it and himself.

"Too far," he mumbled as he got up and shimmied his way to the door. He looked through the peep-hole and cursed. "Oh, fuck. No, no, no, no, no. Go away, Spike, and, yes, I know you can hear me so go the fuck away and spare me having to repeat myself."

Spike tucked his thumbs into his pants and grinned at him through the tiny hole. He leaned forward and his head elongated, one eye appearing several sizes larger than the other. "I don't think so. We've got some unfinished business."

"No, we don't," Xander said quickly, still staring out at misshapen, fish-lens Spike. He leaned against the door, the wood cool against his heated skin.

"Oh, I really think we do. Unless..."

Xander's eyes narrowed. "Unless...what?"

"Unless you want me to go tell the whole bloody world, namely your little pals, about our wonderful night of hot, sweaty, fu--"

"Shut up!" Xander yelled, yanking all the locks and the door open before Spike could finish. He grabbed the vampire and pulled him inside and then slammed the door behind him. "There will be no speaking of this. No one needs to know."

Spike tucked his tongue into the corner of his mouth. "You're going to lie to your little friends? Very un-white hat of you."

"Hey, I don't ask about their sex lives so why should they bring up mine? Besides...personal stuff is...personal. Also, very embarrassing at times and no one needs to know about that."

Spike took off his coat and put it on the rack by the door, which he locked up tight. Off went the big, black boots and his t-shirt before Xander could say anything.

Finally, when the belt was unfastened and Spike was going for the buttons on his jeans, Xander regained control of his vocal cords.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

Spike smirked, pants nearly completely unbuttoned and hanging from his slim hips. Xander could see a hint of pubic hair and the bulge underneath. "I think you know...unless you're completely daft." Spike eyed his distraught state, head tilting to the side. "Which very well may be the case."

", I don't. And...stop getting naked. It's distracting."

"Oh...distracting, am I?" Spike raised his eyebrows and shoved his jeans down until they were puddled around his feet. He stepped out of them and sashayed his naked way to Xander. His erection bobbed and swayed. "How 'bout I do a bit more distracting in the bedroom?"

Spike pressed his body against him and he could feel every line of the vampire's taut body against his own. "But...I don't want this!"

"Wanted it last night..." Spike licked his throat and began to turn them as he walked forward.

Xander moved backward and within moments had been herded into his bedroom.

Sneaky vampire!

"Hey!" Xander exclaimed when he realised what had happened.

Spike pulled Xander's shirt up and Xander was helpless to resist and raised his arms to help remove it. "There now. Half-way there, aren't we?"


"Shut up."

Xander gulped and Spike removed the rest of his clothing and shoved him down on the bed. He bounced, went semi-willingly, and stared wide-eyed as Spike retrieved the lube they'd used last night and crawled onto the bed with a panther's sleek agility and grace.

The muscles beneath Spike's skin moved fluidly and Xander found himself strangely fascinated.

Spike dropped down on him and pressed their pelvises together.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Good shag, aren't you? Besides, they aren't exactly lining up to have a go at me...not since this chip and how I've turned from my own kind to grudgingly help you lot."

Xander glared and shoved Spike off him. "Asshole. You can't fuck me because I'm...convenient. I'm so unconvenient!"

Spike rolled his eyes and shifted onto his side, pressing up against Xander's. He wrapped himself around him and rubbed his erection into Xander's thigh. "Too right, you're not. Becoming rather inconvenient of late. Last night it was you who initiated this little...raw bout of naughty shagging. It's my turn now. Lay back and let old Spike take care of everything."

Xander didn't know why but he couldn't resist. His cock was waving hello to Spike and the vampire was practically rubbing off on him while he opened the lube and pressed Xander's thighs apart.

Xander watched a pale hand creep down between his thighs and when Spike's lubricated fingers touched his still sore pucker he gasped and moved away.

"Now, now, was there all last night, five times to be exact, don't know why you're acting like the timid virgin now. Stop fidgeting."

Xander's jaw dropped open.

Five times?!

No wonder his ass was pretty much hamburger. Jesus.

"Umm, Spike--"

"Shut it," Spike growled, getting impatient. He shoved a finger inside Xander and then retreated, howling in pain as the chip kicked in. "Goddammit!"

While Spike was writhing in pain, clutching his head, Xander had a few moments to think about things and finally decided something.

When Spike had resumed normal functions, cock slowly refilling, eyes blinking back the haze of pain and focusing on him, he launched his surprise attack.

He fell onto Spike and tried to suck the lips right off his face.

After a few minutes, he wrenched his mouth away, wheezing, and braced himself on his forearms above a dazed, panting Spike. "I think I that to you. I'm really sore and will be for a while."

Spike raised an eyebrow and ran both hands down Xander's back to cup the poor ass that had caused all their trouble. "Well," he drawled, spreading his legs and wrapping his thighs around Xander's ribs, heels pressing into the small of Xander's back, "It'll be quite the hardship but...I think I can find it in me to take getting fucked in the name of letting your poor bum heal. Get the lube."

Xander took a breath, lubed himself and then Spike and sank into the vampire far more easily than he thought he would.

His eyes rolled up into the back of his head and his arms trembled as they barely held his weight.

Spike was still and nearly bent into a human-shaped pretzel beneath him but looked like he was having a good time. His jaw was taut, his body tensed, his cock leaking precum onto his belly and his hands clutched Xander's twitching back muscles, trying to draw him even closer. His face wore an expression of complete pleasure.

Spike's eyes fluttered shut but Xander managed to keep his open as he began to fuck Spike.

The silken clasp of Spike's body made it difficult to keep control and he was close to climax before even a dozen thrusts had happened but Anya had given him something any man would be proud to have: restraint and the iron will to stave off orgasm until his partner was satisfied, or at least close to it.

Spike writhed and moaned and bucked beneath him, rubbing his cock against Xander's quivering belly. "Harder," the vampire grit out.

Xander fucked him harder.

"Faster," he gasped.

Xander fucked him faster.

"Oh, Christ," Spike whined, nails raking down his back. "Deeper. Go deeper."

Xander fucked him deeper.

And finally, when Xander thought he'd go insane and just shoot off before he was supposed to, Spike's body began to tremble. The vampire wrapped all his limbs around Xander and threw back his head and came beneath him in uncontrolled spasms.

Xander inhaled sharply and fucked the orgasm from Spike as his own washed over him, nearly drowning him.

He breathed unevenly through it and collapsed on top of Spike when he was finished. He grimaced as he landed with a wet splorching sound, Spike's semen creating a vacuum-like seal between them.

Spike groaned. "Yeah," he panted, "Think I can do with getting fucked for a bit. Have to be more careful next time I bugger you, though. You're prone to piles from the look of it."

Xander tried to raise his head, eyes wide, mouth a thin line of righteous indignation, then he shrugged mentally and gave up to let his face stay squashed into the fine, smooth skin of Spike's throat.

It wasn't worth it. He was still feeling the bliss of post-orgasm. He'd worry about the piles later.

Here Endeth the Story

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