The delightful [info]spiceblueeyes asked me for some Spander with one or both boys wearing just jeans and some coming in pants kink over at [info]nekid_spike...

Hope this is okay for her! I did my best, but apparently my muse draws the line at them actually liking each other in any way. Plus, I can't come up with an even remotely plausible scenario for Spike letting Xander get within ten feet of his cock...

Unless he's tied to a chair, of course ;-)

(Er, apologies to all Spander fans!)


Ash Carpenter

Xander wasn’t always an observant guy. And he generally tended to try to be even less observant when it came to his irritating house guest.

So it wasn’t too surprising that he’d managed to return from the shower humming to himself, finish drying, put on his anti-perspirant and then shimmy his way into a pair of jeans before he noticed the groans and grunts coming from the TV.

He gasped, eyes bugging, as he realised that Spike was watching porn. More specifically, he was watching Straight Naughty College Students 8, which Xander had bought off Gay e-Mart and hidden in his super secret hiding place!

“Oh my God!” he squeaked, mouth instantly going dry. “Where did you get that?!” It occurred to him immediately afterwards that he probably should have been coming up with some sort of convincing story as to how a friend had left it over at his place or something, but it was too late.

Spike leaned as far around the chair as the ropes would allow to look back at Xander. “Oh, this? Well it was in a shoe box at the back of the closet, very convincingly marked “Xander’s old boring text books”. What, did you think that it was your super secret stash or somethin’?” asked Spike with a mocking little grin.

“No!” denied Xander, blushing. “Er, I mean, I don’t know what you’re talking about. That is so not mine!”

“Right,” answered Spike sceptically, turning back to the screen. “You know, for “straight” boys, they seem to like cock an awful lot, don’t they? Heh...Remind you of anyone you know...?”

“Spike, I...” Hold the phone. How had the infuriating vampire even gotten his sticky little hands on the DVD anyway?! And God, Xander hoped that the “sticky” part wasn’t literal. “How did you find that? How did you get out of the damned chair?!”

“Huh? Oh.” Spike looked smug as Xander slowly stepped over so that they could see one another, keeping his eyes studiously averted from the very macho boy being dicked by the first-string quarterback on screen. “You don’t really think that your poorly-tied little pieces of string can hold me, do you?”

Xander gaped in shock as he watched Spike slip his arms free of the bindings, wiggle his hands around and then slide them back in. The vampire shrugged. “Always seems to make you kiddies more comfortable so I go along with it.”

Now that Xander was standing in front of Spike, he could see that the top button of his fly was unfastened and that he had a hard-on. Almost completely incapable of wresting his eyes from the sight, instantly forgetting all of the questions that Spike’s revelation should have raised, Xander asked the only thing that seemed pertinent to him at that particular moment.

“If you can get free, then why the hell are you jerking off with your arms still in the bindings...?”

Spike looked slightly embarrassed and defensive. “Vampire. Just like the kink of it.” Well, it was certainly nothing to do with the fact that it reminded him of Angelus. Not bloody likely. “And I wasn’t wanking! Not yet, at any rate. Thought you were gone. And, speaking of which, why don’t you push off so that I can enjoy my movie? Oh, sorry. Your movie.”

“No! And it’s not mine! And...just no! Give me that remote, biteless,” he ordered, holding his hand out.

“What, this remote?” asked Spike playfully, snatching it up off the arm of the barcalounger and waggling it from side to side.

Xander made a grab for it and missed. Almost snarling in frustration, he chased it as Spike switched it from hand to hand, grinning manically. Finally, so intent on his prize that common sense fled the building, he managed to follow the small plastic device all the way into Spike’s lap.

Again, continuing his theme of non-observation, it took Xander a few long, wriggly seconds before he became aware of the fact that he was straddling Spike in his chair.

And Spike was still hard.

Xander stilled immediately, swallowing loudly. He’d been so busy trying not to panic that Spike had found him with gay porn that it was the first time he’d taken the time to absorb the fact that Spike had been watching – and getting off on – said porn. Well, heck. That was a little out of the blue.

And now, he was half naked and writhing around on evil, formerly deadly, apparently bi-curious dead guy’s lap. Huh. That probably wasn’t too smart. On the other hand, it was one hell of a fun thing to be able to hold over Spike’s head...and the vampire couldn’t hurt him. He was even (sort of) tied down!

“Do you like this, Spikey?” asked Xander and, even though he was mocking, there was genuine curiosity in his tone.

“What? Having a half-witted babbling geek boy in my lap when I’m trying to watch porn? Not really, no.”

Xander growled as he made a sudden lunge for the remote and Spike kept it out of his hands once more. “So what is it then? Do you actually get off on being annoying?”

Spike was about to protest strongly, when he wondered whether it might be a teensy bit true. Well, even if it was, then it was completely Angelus and Darla’s fault; irritating them had been the only way to get any sodding attention!

Xander saw Spike’s eyelids give a little involuntary flutter as he accidentally nudged up against the vampire’s shaft with a particularly forceful motion of his hips. Well, wasn’t that interesting?

“My God, you do, don’t you?! Pissing everyone off gets you hard!”

Spike growled a little, jerking his hips up out of the seat and dragging his groin against Xander’s. “No, pillock! The hot little boys begging to get their arses reamed on the telly get me hard. So what’s your excuse?”

In keeping with the theme du jour, Xander somehow hadn’t noticed that he was erect. The revelation was admittedly disconcerting, but truthfully Xander was more concerned with getting one over on Spike, who’d been a complete pain in the ass for...well, as long as Xander could remember. And the nimrod was always making disparaging comments about Xander’s sexual prowess and orientation, so this was a golden opportunity for payback.

“Don’t change the subject, Blondie. I want to know about this kink you have for straight boys...Especially since you seem to like having me in your lap so much...”

Looking pretty pleased with himself, Xander pushed forwards and exerted a little more pressure on Spike, who grunted.

“Yeah, right. Couple of problems with that, mate. First off, I said I liked hot boys. Second of all, I like them straight. You don’t exactly qualify – on either count.”

He was posturing and he knew it; he suspected that the kid knew it too. He hadn’t really thought too deeply about Xander in a sexual sense, but he had listened with some interest to Anya’s assertions that he was a Viking and he had sneaked a few peeks at him when he’d been changing. He’d also been unexpectedly delighted (although not particularly surprised) to stumble across the gay porn. Plus, he had to admit that the boy was really working the nothing-but-jeans look, his smoothly muscled chest more alluring than Spike would have guessed.

And then of course there was the fact that he was writhing round like a two-bit whore, thrusting up against Spike’s cock. That was going a pretty bloody long way towards making him seem more attractive; Spike hadn’t exactly been getting much recently.

“Oh, right...So my hot little bod’s not doing anything for you, huh?” grinned Xander teasingly, rocking against Spike and watching his head fall back against the barcalounger, fists clenching.

“It’d be doing more if you’d quit flapping your mouth.”

Spike canted his hips, figuring that if the lad was that intent on keeping him hard then he might as well let him. Wasn’t as if he had any better offers.

Xander couldn’t believe it: Spike had basically just admitted to being hot for him and appeared to be keen to let him get him off. The irritating vampire was just leaning submissively back in the chair, trying to pump his hips up and making soft and deep little groans in his throat. He looked completely content to just let Xander take things to their conclusion! Oh boy...Xander well and truly had the upper hand now.

Grabbing hold of Spike’s biceps, noting absently that his muscles were incredibly well defined, Xander used the grip as an anchor to allow him to grind more fully against the blond’s hard length. And, oh yeah, Spike was liking that, pushing his hips up and chasing the feeling. And, yeah, actually Xander was liking it quite a lot too, but that so wasn’t the point.

Spike noticed that Xander’s motions were becoming harder and faster and that he was slightly breathless; Spike could smell the faint tang of fresh sweat gathering at the nape of his neck and realised that the kid was probably enjoying this just a little too much for his own good. Heh, that could be amusing.

Spike arched forwards in the chair, moaning deliberately closely to Xander’s mouth such that his breath skittered over parted lips. He stifled a smile as the brunet swallowed hard and leaned forward just the tiniest bit more the next time that he thrust up against Spike. Their mouths almost brushed.

The vampire didn’t talk, knowing that it might inadvertently snap Xander out of the lust haze that he appeared to have settled into. Fuck but the kid was going for broke now, grunting as he ground his hips against Spike, forcing small sounds of pleasure from his throat. Spike looked down at where blue denim was sliding against faded black, the hard columns of their dicks straining against the fabric and a deep, burning friction just adding to their arousal. Xander’s bare, supple torso undulated with his movements and Spike noticed the cute little roll of puppy fat just above the low-slung waistband of his jeans.

Xander liked the way that Spike sounded. It was a lot different to a woman, obviously (not that he was the expert, what with only having been with two women...but at least they hadn’t been evil demons. Well, apart from Anya). But it was also different from the guys on screen, mostly because it was a little more subtle, less bellowed “Yeah, fuck that ass!”es and more deep, needy impossible-to-completely-repress noises. He liked the way that they seemed to roll over his skin.

Xander abruptly, and with a great deal of shock, registered the fact that his determination to turn Spike on had somehow morphed into an exercise in getting himself off as hard and fast as possible. And he couldn’t even really blame the vampire for it, what with him being tied to a chair...(not that it would stop him because, really, most things were Spike’s fault anyway).

Xander considered stopping the insanity, but then Spike twisted his lithe hips upwards and there was a yummy pressure dragging across his balls and dick and all notions of halting the proceedings flew right out the window, along with his coherency.

“Oh fu...Da...yu-huh,” mumbled Xander eyelids fluttering. He felt his cock release another spurt of pre-cum into his jeans and he dug his fingers into Spike’s arms even harder.

Spike thought it was safe to say that Xander had liked that, so he repeated the action several times, discovering that he rather liked it himself. He’d thought it would be fun to push the boy until he either freaked out totally or embarrassed himself but now, in all honesty, Spike just wanted to get off. He was close too, just like the kid; he could smell the combined scent of their salt soaking through heavy material.

Body responding to the embodiment of sex below him, brain having off-lined a considerable while ago, Xander chased his orgasm, wondering how long he’d been dreaming of actually trying something with a guy. Man, it was hot, especially since Spike’s hands were restrained and there was an exciting illusion of helplessness. Within a few more hard thrusts, Xander’s body was shaking with the effort of it, lust cresting within him and making him grunt as he breathed harshly through his nose.

All it took was one look into deep, lust-fucked blue eyes, desire swallowing him up, and Xander was crying out and shooting in his pants, cock pulsing jets of spunk which instantly soaked into the denim.

It was so hot and dirty that Spike almost came too and he only realised that he was still trying to fuck up against Xander from his disadvantageous position a few seconds later when the boy stared at him in horror and abruptly slithered off him to land in an ungainly heap on the floor.

“Hey!” shouted Spike as Xander immediately leaped to his feet, looking down at the spreading wet patch on his jeans with complete mortification. “I haven’t finished!”

“Oh my God,” breathed Xander, running his hand agitatedly through his hair and over his face. “I...I don’t know what happened; I must have been thinking about the movie...or Anya. In fact, it didn’t happen. You got that? This never happened!” He was almost shouting, hysteria bubbling jubilantly just below the surface.

Spike opened his mouth to demand (or potentially beg) that the stupid whelp just get back on his lap and finish him off, but he shut it with an audible snap before any words tumbled out. Now that Xander wasn’t incapacitated by lust, there was no way in hell that he’d help Spike out – and if Spike asked, then the kid would know just how much of an effect his enthusiastic bouncing had achieved; he’d realise that Spike had been within a whisper of dirtying his own jeans...

Spike didn’t want to be sussed out and humiliated as well as being left unsatisfied. So he tried to ignore his need and do the only thing that he could do. He laughed mockingly.

“Never happened, eh? Better slap those clothes into the washer sharpish then, hadn’t you? Wouldn’t want anyone knowing that I turned you on so much that you sprayed your pants like a little kid...”

“Shut up!” yelled Xander, flushing a deep and almost alarming puce. “I...but...You liked it too!” he accused.

“Well, sure. Couldn’t quite stop myself from responding to a warm, writhing body hell-bent on getting me off. In case you’ve forgotten, I couldn’t get up, not with my hands tied and your weight in my lap. Bloody assault, it was!”

Part of Xander knew that Spike was full of shit. But the larger part – the part concerned with the fact that he’d just frotted against a male vampire that he hated and come in his pants doing so – was just humiliated and guilty. He quickly turned and rushed over to his dresser, grabbing some spare clothes.

“If you tell anyone about this, I’ll kill you! I swear to God, Spike, I’ll stake you while you sleep...”

Spike scoffed. “Yeah, right. As if I want anyone knowing that I had you anywhere near my dick. Please.”

Lowering his eyes, still mortified with embarrassment, Xander walked over to the barcalounger, dropping his clothes on the floor for a moment. Quickly and efficiently, obviously trying not to touch Spike at all, he tightened the ropes binding him to the chair.

“Oi! What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing?!” demanded Spike in outrage.

“I don’t want you going through my stuff anymore; you’ve already done enough,” mumbled Xander, not meeting his eyes and immediately snatching up his fresh garments when he had finished. Without another word, he fled the room.

Spike fumed, left alone with the strong scent of spilled spunk, a raging hard-on and no free hands.


He hated living in ruddy basements...

The End

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