Three Spike/Xander drabbles, NC-17. Written for the prompt "stress" at [info]open_on_sunday.

Reference link re: Hysteria.

Hysteria, Interlude, Hysterical Paroxysm




“What? No, I’m just... in a bad mood.”

Spike snorts. “You’re irritable, you’re not eating, and you haven’t tried to fuck me in…” he looks at the clock. “Forty-nine hours!”

“I’m not crazy, Spike!”

Spike rolls his eyes. “It’s an illness, you git. Like stress.”

“Well then how come I’ve never heard of it?”

“Dunno. Maybe ‘cause you never read?”

“I read,” Xander grumbles. “You think I should see a doctor?”

“Nah. ‘S an easy fix. Used to happen a lot in my day. I’ll just run out and get what you need.”

“What, like Tylenol?”

“Not exactly, mate.”


Spike removes a slick finger from Xander’s ass. “You ready?”

Xander closes his eyes. “Are you sure about this, Spike?”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

Xander tries to turn, but Spike lays a hand firmly on his shoulder.

“I’ve never heard of this as a cure for stress,” Xander says.

“’S not stress. Hysteria.”

“And you’re sure this is the treatment.” Xander’s not convinced.

Spike sighs and plants a kiss on the small of Xander’s back.

“Yeah. Been a while since I read about it—”

Spike strokes Xander’s ass and squeezes.

“What do you mean, been a while?”

Hysterical Paroxysm

“Spike, what do you mean, been a while?”

“‘S not the kind of thing a bloke’s likely to forget.”

Spike inserts the plastic rod slowly.


“Hmm? Oh, ‘bout a hundred years, give or take.”

“WHAT?! You—”

Xander’s exclamation is cut short when Spike hits the switch and Xander’s entire lower body begins to vibrate.

“Come to think of it, this might have been a treatment they did on women…”

Xander’s about to raise hell when Spike changes the angle of the vibrator, and Xander’s brains are unceremoniously blown out through his dick.

“Better?” Spike asks.

“Better,” Xander agrees.

Author's Note: Hysteria was Victorian era women's medical condition which was incorrecty diagnosed and is no longer acknowledged by the medical community. An extremely broad set of symptoms was attributable to Hysteria. The cure was pelvic massage by a doctor, resulting in hysterical paroxysm (orgasm). This information and more is available at the reference link noted above.

The End

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